No... way.
It was Chef all along. Chef who broke into Jimbo's store. Chef who killed all those people, night after night after night. Officer Barbrady was so close with his investigations; the dunce pinned the old school teacher, Miss Choksondik, and the old bus driver Miss Crabtree. Chef brought them together with the mutual hatred for South Park.
Boy, did South Park pay. The town agreed that there could only possibly be one way to turn after Mr. Garrison's death. Mr. Hat, the scorned lover; however, Mr. Hat hadn't spoken to Mr. Garrison for some time after getting caught "cheating" with Satan and cast aside by the gay school teacher. The very vocal Big Gay Al was slaughtered with a hammer that same night, placing a fire under the kiester of one hard working policeman. And work hard he had, stringing up Ms. Choksondik with charges of aiding and abedding in the gun shop break in just two nights prior.
After a long day of back and forth deliberation, the floppy-tittied teacher was shown the same South Park justice that Mr. Hat had gotten just the day before. That night the heinous actions got even more vile as what couldn't have been anything but an innocent bystander at the wrong place at the wrong time. Chef murdered Wendy Testaburger on her way back home from a friend's house that night... perhaps to avenge the life of his fallen comrade? Perhaps, but the trail was still hot and Officer Barbrady struck gold two nights in a row after finding damning evidence about the returning school bus driver, Miss Crabtree. It seemed that the bird in her hair had a thing for buttons... Wendy Testeburger's buttons, no less, and that was more than enough proof for the town to successfully take out two out of the three wrong-doers consecutively.
This left Chef all along; unfortunately for South Park, Chef worked better when he flew solo. He went under the radar, basically almost speaking only when spoken to and making certain his views weren't entirely unmanagable. He had to change the tune on this third night of horror -- on this night, he would kill Officer Barbrady just before the policeman would make a call to the Mayor with key evidence against the former singing sensation (who was probably the inspiration to High School Musical). After giving Barbrady the proverbial 'axe,' it all seemed too easy from there. The town was in shambles; they began throwing accusations in every which direction, especially so after Miss Crabtree lost her damn rocker and almost blew Chef's cover over the day previous.
Another school child would die before his time on the fourth day. Poor Token Black; however, some would say that it's ironic that he was lynched. ANYWAYS, Chef smirked and stayed in the shadows with shotgun in hand. This next kill had to be
bigger
than any so far -- it just HAD to be Canadian sensations Terrence and Phillip who had flown in on a working-vacation. The stars owed this little town so much for their super stardom... they paid their respects with their lives.
Day five got even more hectic. Everyone's head was seemingly cut the hell off as they decided that all signs pointed to a lying Jimbo Kern. No way could the gun shop have been broken into without the owner's knowledge. It was pure insanity! He ate rope... but the town knew the problem was still very alive when Cartman died that night.
And nothing of value was lost.
Day six. Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo; Pip Pirrup, the ex-classmate who was seemingly eaten by Mecha Striesand; Chef, the culprit. Fingers flew in every direction on this day... and it seemed as if justice would be served as Pip came in with the hard logic and tried to convince the festive feces that it was Chef all along. Chef contested that he was very much alive and it was the pattern of coming back from the grave that tied the boy to his former bus driver, a teacher he never had, and the deaths of his former classmates. In the end, unfortunately, Chef would convince the Christmas Poo that it was the boy.
Poor South Park.
Scum take control of South Park!
Quilford, Chef, Mafia Don, survives until endgame and wins for scum!
andrew, Ms. Choksondik, Mafia Goon, dies Day 2 and wins!
jilynne, Ms. Crabtree, Mafia Goon, dies Day 3 and wins![/color]
That being said, I'd normally turn jil neutral survivor and give her the auto-loss; however, it appears she's leaving the site, so I'll let her go out on a good note. Really hated having her replace in (all things considered) but it worked out... so what the hell?
I'd like to thank the whole player list for being super awesome and understanding of my hiccups. I hope it was as fun for you as it was for me.
/pre-in for my Large Normal! I'm actually very deeply considering continuing this storyline and having the more prominent characters (that weren't killed off) take roles in the next one.
"Fuck you. I opened up my heart to you and you stabbed it a thousand times." - Gamma, to me, right before confessing to being the town vig and murdering my scum partner N1.