Mafiascum Movie Club

[Internet Stranger]

Bah im such a slacker. I will have to hit the pirate sites soon.

[Internet Stranger]

13th Floor

So this guy has this little antfarm-like virtual world of people that's set
in the 1930's. During his work, he makes this discovery and is going to tell
his partner when he heard the boogeyman coming. Being the clever mad
scientist that he is, he gets the fancy idea to hide a letter with his
discovery in the virtual antfarm and then gets killed. The killer obviously
has never seen a movie before, because everytime a scientist or an inventor
are about to get murdered, they always hide the important document in their
work.


His partner is now the main suspect, so to clear his name he jumps in and out
of the antfarm to play dressup with the locals and oh yea, to look for clues
and the letter as well.


The main thing with this movie is that its supposed to be scary and
mysterious, like a Hitchcock movie. But it ends up being more like dark and
slow. The main partner guy is like a wooden mannequin. He walks around all
stoic and expressionless. Even when he is supposed to be angry, he just gives
a fake snarl and that's about it.


For a guy that's supposed to be desperate to clear his name with a cop ready
to arrest him, he sure doesn't look all that desperate, he is just so cool.
And there isn't a well defined bad guy. The cop isn't all that overbearing,
just one of them lonely type detectives that work on no-name assignments, he
might as well be a pushover. The wacky bartender? He looks more retarded than
intimidating (It is that Vincent D'Onofrio guy after all).


After lollygagging in circles with the braindead bartender through most of
the movie, everything gets revealed at once. Then on top of that you throw in
a dues ex machina mindscrew ending and sprinkle in a tame out of place sex
scene with a hot chick and you have yourself mediocrity on a stick.


Grade: C

[Internet Stranger]

By the way, I want to be put on the queue and I submit

Seven Samurai

as my movie.

[Internet Stranger]

If youre going to look for Kurosawa stuff now, look for Nora Inu (Stray Dog) as well.

[Internet Stranger]

Beautiful Mind

Wow, what a globbling job on John Nash. There are some really evil stories about him floating about that they barely scratched the surface on. I guess they didnt want people who have no clue who he is to get the impression that he is mean because he likes it, rather than he is just crazy.

I always imagined Crowe to be like that naturally anyways, so the part fit him well.

And Connelly needs to eat a damn sandwhich, skeletal woman as so not sexy.

Still, I was entertained, so...

Grade: A

Dr. Strangelove

I understand the point the movie was trying to make. Looking back at it, especially after all these years, it all seems just as silly as it was depicted in the movie. Definitely had classic comedic moments in it. The older people will really get the point better than the younger ones. Even so, it dragged a little at some points for me, but I guess thats because im on the younger side of the crowd. So...

Grade: B

[Internet Stranger]

Cutting Edge

It just couldnt be any more average. I didnt find anything remarkable from it.

Grade: C

[Internet Stranger]

The Village:

For something that was supposed to be oh so scary and suspenceful, this thing barely tickled. The villagers just looked like ignorant uptight buttmunches. At once point, once you realize that the movie is dragging without even a whiff of the ooh scary monsters your mind starts churning and ding, you figure it out.

You cant help it, not because of some clueful relevation, its because the acting is so hokey that you just start thinking about the ending, hoping it comes sometime soon.

I didnt even realize that the girl was supposed to be blind until it was almost over. Yea, a blind person running through the woods, she might as well have been carrying scissors too.

Grade: D

[Internet Stranger]

If you really need another, ill nominate

Eurotrip

. But with a strong anti-kiddie warning.

[Internet Stranger]

Whenever you need another one, you should try

Batman: Mask of the Phantasm

.

Yes, its animated, but its not necessarily juvenile. Its actually a really interesting story, its got elements of love, romance, mystery, action; just like any other movie. Its the best Batman work I have ever seen, animated or live action and only second to one of the comics.

Besides, the purpose of this is to expand your horizons, right?

[Internet Stranger]

Yes please.

[Internet Stranger]

Hey Meme, btw, the movie is rather long.

[Internet Stranger]

Seven Samurai

What I enjoyed the most about the movie is how your allegiances change and your opinion of everyone changes throughout the movie. The ones who you were rooting for at first you tend to start rooting against later on.

Even at the end its hard to determine who were the real winners and who were the real losers.

Grade: A

[Internet Stranger]

Bubba Ho-Tep

Fishbulb. You owe me 90 minutes of my life for this.

Grade: D

It would be an F, but I happen to like Bruce Campbell and I like the idea of a curmudgeon old Elvis, but horrible execution all around.

[Internet Stranger]

What slows me down is that my.. um.. normal video supplier is not always going to have everything. I have to poke around in proverbial dark back alleys to find some.

ON that note:

Cube

After the first 30 minutes I was already thinking to myself, it cant just be more of this same stuff over and over for another 60 minutes. Then the people started going all wacky and insane and it picked up quite a bit. I was still a bunch of amateur hour, but if your expectations arent astronomical, youll be just fine.

Looks like the movie did what it set out to do, and nothing more.

Grade: B

[Internet Stranger]

Ocean's 11

Standard typical caper movie. In most of these movies, the characters are so supernatural at what they do that they might as well wear capes and superhero custumes. I have seen some that can do everything while boinking your mother at the same time. These guys arent so bad, although they dont necessarily have any flaws either.

I dont understand the appeal of Julia Roberts either. She has the face of a horse.

Grade: B

[Internet Stranger]

Run Lola Run

The concept was interesting. I have seen similar things before, but this movie really put it to use best. I would give it an A, but I flat out hated the supernatural shit. That just gnawed at me everytime they did it. Something about the chicks attitude I didnt like as well, maybe I sensed a selfishness about both of them. Screw you all, we come first type of thing. I cant quite figure it out.

Grade: B

[Internet Stranger]

Batman: The Mask of the Phantasm

The only thing I didnt like about this movie was that the they werent always clear when they were cutting into a flashback. Eventually you realize, oh yea this was a flashback, but then they would go back to present time and not even tell you either.

Otherwise I was satisfied with the story itself, there was the mystery aspect, the passionate romance, a few cliches, plenty of action and backstory as well. Even the ending managed to touch a piece of my cold dark souless heart.

Grade: B

[Internet Stranger]

So whats the deal? Is this getting abandoned?

[Internet Stranger]

Im having problems finding these obscure movies from my sources. I may have to actually hit video stores at some point.