Identity

[StrangerCoug]

Has used the same username all over the Internet since they were 13 is like 50% of people here.

16 here.

[Vi]

I didn't even use the Internet when I was 13.

high five
there was never a time when people thought dial-up was good

[KittyMo]

Discussing identities that you are in the PoE pool for when you have not been asked by the contestant to talk about them is not intended to be part of the game. Do not do this. If there is an Identity in a round that you did not submit that also applies to you, let me know privately. When this happens I will privately ask the original submitter to make their identity more specific or, if they cannot, ask them to switch it to a different identity altogether.

I'm not going to make a rule that no one in the thread can make any kind of commentary on the game without being asked to via ingame mechanics bc I don't think this is as Serious Business as mafia/survivor/etc., but please use good judgment about whether something unduly influences the game.

The only way I can come up with to salvage this at this point is for Aristophanes, LlamaFluff, Shadoweh, & xofelf to submit new identities to me by (expired on 2017-04-22 16:02:32). I'll replace anyone with a new Stranger who has not done so by then. (If you have already submitted a bunch to me previously you don't need to; just not gonna name names publicly in case it somehow influences the game.)

Sorry to racefan that this has happened.

[KittyMo]

I'm going to go ahead and have CuddlyCaucasian and Realeo replace StrangerCoug and Vijarada for this round as I already have IDs from them.

[KittyMo]

StrangerCoug and Vijarada have privately apologized and I appreciate that.

xofelf hasn't sent me a new Identity so I'm gonna put Apricity in instead.

Here is the mid-round reveal:

Strangers	Identities
StrangerCoug	A waiter at Olive Garden recently got [Stranger] to laugh when he jokingly claimed to charge $20 for each time he turned the crank on the cheese grater
LlamaFluff	Has had their apartment complex burn down
xofelf	Has used the same username all over the Internet since they were 13
Vijarada	Is on a mission to eat every food for under 6$ at a local food court
Shadoweh	Took part in a pagan wedding ceremony in the woods
Aristophanes	Was the head of the Environmental Club and the Healthy Eating Action Team (HEAT) in high school

---

Welcome back to Identity, racefan. Here are your strangers and their identities:

Strangers	Identities
D3f3nd3r	A Massachusetts radio station played a song where [Stranger] sang and played the kazoo
Haschel Cedricson	Adores Pokemon and has a Pikachu-shaped carrier bag used to carry small things
implosion	Once dressed up for Halloween as the ghost of the U.S. economy
Regfan	The middle finger on [Stranger's] right hand is still swollen and misshapen from hurting it about four years ago
UpTooLate	Was taken to a strip club by [Stranger's] Uncle when they were 18
Yume	Would eat everything with chopsticks if they could

Strangers	Identities
Apricity	Has never seen Seinfeld but listens to a weekly podcast about it
Aristophanes	Once beat a teacher in his own game and saved the entire class from failing an exam for the victory
CuddlyCaucasian	Once bought a new dresser and discovered it was made out of cardboard after opening
LlamaFluff	Regular SB Nation contributor
Realeo	Tells people that My Chemical Romance was [Stranger's] first concert, but it was actually Five Man Electrical Band
Shadoweh	Thoroughly enjoys airplane flights and will spend a lot of time looking out the window

Assistance:

1 Question | Double Dip | Mistaken Identity | Tri-Identity

[Realeo]

There is Olive Garden in Australia?

[D3f3nd3r]

StrangerCoug is from New Mexico.

[racefan12]

Well looking at the new group, I know that I played fantasy football against Llamafluff and none of the others seem like the type to be big sports fans, so I'm going to say that

Llamafluff is the regular SB Nation contributor

.

[KittyMo]

Correct

Strangers	Identities
D3f3nd3r	A Massachusetts radio station played a song where [Stranger] sang and played the kazoo
Haschel Cedricson	Adores Pokemon and has a Pikachu-shaped carrier bag used to carry small things
implosion	Once dressed up for Halloween as the ghost of the U.S. economy
Regfan	The middle finger on [Stranger's] right hand is still swollen and misshapen from hurting it about four years ago
UpTooLate	Was taken to a strip club by [Stranger's] Uncle when they were 18
Yume	Would eat everything with chopsticks if they could

Strangers	Identities
Apricity	Has never seen Seinfeld but listens to a weekly podcast about it
Aristophanes	Once beat a teacher in his own game and saved the entire class from failing an exam for the victory
CuddlyCaucasian	Once bought a new dresser and discovered it was made out of cardboard after opening
Realeo	Tells people that My Chemical Romance was [Stranger's] first concert, but it was actually Five Man Electrical Band
Shadoweh	Thoroughly enjoys airplane flights and will spend a lot of time looking out the window

Correct Matches	Amount Won
11	$500,000
10	$250,000
9	$150,000
8	$75,000
7	$50,000
6	$20,000
5	$10,000
4	$5,000
3	$2,000
2	$1,000
1	$500

Assistance:

2 Questions | Double Dip | Mistaken Identity | Tri-Identity

[racefan12]

Well hey at least I won't go scoreless!

OK let's see... the dresser one is probably someone old enough to be living on their own and have need to buy their own dresser, so that puts Shadow and Aristophanes as most likely for that.

The Seinfeld one is probably someone who was too young to have watched Seinfeld when it originally aired (Apricity/CC?) and/or not from the US/Canada (Realeo).

The other ones could be anyone as far as I know.

Aristophanes, please tell me about your reaction to finding out that the dresser was cardboard and what you ended up doing with it.

[Aristophanes]

Aristophanes, please tell me about your reaction to finding out that the dresser was cardboard and what you ended up doing with it.

Hahaha Oh that thing!

Well, I got it from my work, Canadian Tire, and honestly should have caught on when it was so light, but I really didn't think about it. I needed a dresser because I had recently moved out of student housing and had been using one left behind by the last guy. I figured that since it wasn't mine to begin with, I couldn't very well claim it when I moved. So anyway, I took this thing out of the box and...it was made of fucking box! I actually cut into the side of it without thinking because I figured there had to be proper wood in there somewhere! But nope!

So, I assembled it anyway because there's no way I was going to go back to work with it and show how much of a dumbass I was to all my coworkers! I kept it for about a year before I found an actual dresser on the side of the road and carried it home. The old one I offered to my sister, but she didn't want it, so I recycled it.

[racefan12]

Hmmmmm.

Shadow, same question.

[xofelf]

Ack! Sorry. I totally forgot to resubmit.

[Realeo]

RISE LIKE A PHOENIX! FROM THE ASHES RISE LIKE A PHONEIX!

[Shadoweh]

*loud snoring*

*pop*

AAAAAA!

Aristophanes

Shadoweh, please tell me about your reaction to finding out that the dresser was cardboard and what you ended up doing with it.

I live blogged my inner screaming to my skype friends including the process of putting the piece of shit together. Because I brought it all the way upstairs and started assembling it halfway before realizing what it was I just put it together and put it in my walk-in closet. It is holding pants.

[CuddlyCaucasian]

I'm in this one!

[racefan12]

I guess I've been playing/watching too much survivor because I'm having a hard time believing anyone's story, but I'm gonna say that

Shadoweh bought the cardboard dresser.

[Shadoweh]

I always tell the truth in Survivor.

This piece of crap didn't have material labels on the outside, just a brown or black version. I thought it was you know, thin wood or metal, maybe plastic? I wasn't expecting them to be selling paper-thin cardboard covered in a thin layer of felt that makes it look like a respectable storage unit in the paper. Everyone told me to take it back but eh.. it fits and whatever. I consider it the price of buying cheap and not checking what I was getting!

[KittyMo]

As Shadoweh confirmed, she did buy the cardboard dresser.

Strangers	Identities
D3f3nd3r	A Massachusetts radio station played a song where [Stranger] sang and played the kazoo
Haschel Cedricson	Adores Pokemon and has a Pikachu-shaped carrier bag used to carry small things
implosion	Once dressed up for Halloween as the ghost of the U.S. economy
Regfan	The middle finger on [Stranger's] right hand is still swollen and misshapen from hurting it about four years ago
UpTooLate	Was taken to a strip club by [Stranger's] Uncle when they were 18
Yume	Would eat everything with chopsticks if they could

Strangers	Identities
Apricity	Has never seen Seinfeld but listens to a weekly podcast about it
Aristophanes	Once beat a teacher in his own game and saved the entire class from failing an exam for the victory
CuddlyCaucasian	Tells people that My Chemical Romance was [Stranger's] first concert, but it was actually Five Man Electrical Band
Realeo	Thoroughly enjoys airplane flights and will spend a lot of time looking out the window

Correct Matches	Amount Won
11	$500,000
10	$250,000
9	$150,000
8	$75,000
7	$50,000
6	$20,000
5	$10,000
4	$5,000
3	$2,000
2	$1,000
1	$500

Assistance:

1 Question | Double Dip | Mistaken Identity | Tri-Identity

[racefan12]

Apricity, what made you decide to start listening to the weekly Seinfeld podcast and what has kept you from seeing the show?

[Realeo]

Isn't that 2 questions? Choose one?

[xofelf]

People have done this sort of thing before, Realeo. Don't backseat mod <3

[Realeo]

<3

It's just my question was canceled for being 2 questions before.

[KittyMo]

racefan's question is in a grey area to me because on the one hand, yes it uses "and" to combine two clauses that can be thought of as two separate questions, but the question itself is also pretty functionally similar to him literally just being like, "Can you expand on why both clauses of this identity are the case?" which is why I'm not officially going to rule on it. What counts as one question is not really something I can nail a specific definition to, so I would like to encourage people to just use their best judgment and I'll step in if I think someone's angleshooting/repeatedly toeing the line.

The situation Realeo's recalling from his first round as a contestant was interesting. The identity he was trying to get more information about was "Cisgender but often mistaken for the wrong gender by strangers over the phone." What was asked was "Question to all 6: Are you male or female or other non-binary gender? If you're binary gender then can I have your "attributes" (heterosex or homosex), please?" Why I primarily ruled against it was that it was phrased as having a follow-up question based on one's answer to the first part of it; I felt like it was formatted to functionally be addressing two things at once. I'm not honestly sure I would have canceled it if he'd just asked those people "What is your gender identity and sexual orientation?" But there were a few other factors that led me to ruling to cancel the questions. One was that Realeo had previously in the round been in a grey area IMO by asking a multi-part question: "Question for CheeryDog: I know you're an Aussie who works in computer--buy can you be specific? Is it a house in Canberra that belongs to you? Is it an apartment in Perth that you rent? Is it your parent's house in Melbourne? Something like that." Which was understandable to me since he's not a native English speaker and even though he was phrasing it as multiple questions, he was really only looking for one answer; but having multiple "iffy" questions in the same round is part of what led me to ruling on Realeo's gender/attribute question. Another factor was that I had a couple of people reach out to me saying that they were really uncomfortable with the premise of the question. Another factor was that, due to a combination of the nature of the gender/sexual orientation question and due to a stranger not understanding the questioning mechanic, they answered his question with "I'm not cis and so this identity isn't mine." So, all of that combined led me to want to take a step back with that line of questioning. Not sure I handled it the best way possible, but that's some insight into why I made the decision I made at the time.

[Errantparabola]

Hi sorry i think i inned for contestant sorry i was vague