Planet MafiaScum - ALL HAIL DARK LORD INSPIRATIELOOS

[izakthegoomba]

It doesn't, but that's not to say you couldn't start them.

And yes, if it's not done by Monday we'll just run it alongside the game.

[izakthegoomba]

That question has already been answered anyway...

[izakthegoomba]

An NPC.

[izakthegoomba]

Yes, I really ought to get a new one.

[izakthegoomba]

Gameplay can continue as normal alongside the trial.

Xanatos should be giving you money some time soon.

[izakthegoomba]

The person in the video looks exactly like the strawman put temporarily in charge, with an unknown individual really ruling the country. It looks nothing like Kiwieagle II, who took office when the straw man was "killed". It is possible that Kiwieagle II was ruling through the straw man; however, no proof of this has been presented.

"If there are any more statements to be made, please speak now."

[izakthegoomba]

The jury will now retire to consider their verdicts.

[izakthegoomba]

Verdicts

The jury re-enter the courtroom and take their seats. The forewoman stands, and reads the verdicts...

"We now hear the verdicts of King Kiwieagle II of Flying Kiwi.

"Count four verdict,

"We find the defendant

not guilty

of perfidy against Melodica and Mistotopia, as charged in count four of the indictment.

"Count four lesser verdict,

"We find the defendant

not guilty

of war of aggression against Dinotopia, as charged in count four of the indictment.

"Count five verdict,

"We find the defendant

not guilty

of mass murder of civilians through poisoning in Fallen Angels, as charged in count five of the indictment.

"Count six verdict,

"We find the defendant

not guilty

of mass murder of civilians through poisoning in Melodica, as charged in count six of the indictment.

"Count eight verdict,

"We find the defendant

guilty

of mass murder of civilians through the use of biochemical weapons, as charged in count eight of the indictment."

The jury are forbidden from revealing anything that was said or done to reach these verdicts.

[izakthegoomba]

Sentencing

"We now hear the sentencing of King Kiwieagle II of Flying Kiwi.

"The court hereby sentences King Kiwieagle II to

life imprisonment

for mass murder of civilians through the use of biochemical weapons, as charged in count eight of the indictment. The court recommends that he serves a minimum of

50 years

."

[izakthegoomba]

The court has ruled that Kiwieagle will be held in a super-maximum security prison in Flying Kiwi.

[izakthegoomba]

Flying Kiwi, while damaged, is not destroyed, has an obvious leader, and has a prison more than capable of holding Kiwieagle.

[izakthegoomba]

The court has passed sentence. If you disagree with that sentence, feel free to make an appeal.

[izakthegoomba]

You'll have to make a case to the Court of Appeals. It's a very lengthy process.

Also, it's a life sentence, with 50 years recommended as the

minimum

you serve.

[izakthegoomba]

Not your country anymore, etc.

@izak: kiwi is in jail. why is he still playing?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Kiwi, why are you still playing?

[izakthegoomba]

Emergency Mod-V/LA for up to a week, until I can get a new iPod charger. I can probably get online by borrowing a laptop, but I could suddenly vanish.

Xanatos, could you do an OP update if you have the time? It's just your update onwards that needs doing.

[izakthegoomba]

Today will undoubtedly become a momentous day in world history, marking the alliance and unity of four nations.

Today, the

Suvonian Union

unveiled itself. It is a joining of Arnor, Chesstopia, The (newly-renamed) Kiwani Republic and Astariel I, promising to rebuild the nation to it's former greatness, and take it even further. Using the stability and size of Arnor, the technologies of Chesstopia, and the remaining strength of The Kiwani Republic, it intends to repair the damage done, bring order back to Chesstopia after the chaos following the downfall of the Chesskid family, and give Astariel I a strong government for the first time.

At the press conference in Arnor, a spokesman said,

"In the new Suvonian Union, we aim to bring democracy and fairness to each individual nation, while governing them from a central council in Arnor, lead by Chancellor Inspiratieloos, and comprised of the Union's most important figures.

"In one year (~8 weeks), elections will be held to choose a more permanent Chancellor, in which every Suvonian may vote. In two years (~15 weeks), each of the four nations will elect their own leader, who will also become a part of the council in Arnor.

"In the meantime, our main focus will be repairing and stabilising the Union, before pursuing both physical and economic growth."

---

OP update with this tomorrow.

[izakthegoomba]

Is chesskid in control of Chesstopia, or has he been eliminated with kiwi?

downfall of the Chesskid family

[izakthegoomba]

OP updated.

@kiwi first, your case would heard by the Court of Appeals anyway. Second, no, you cant make up a backstory part way through. It's pointless, anyway.

@inspi it depends who they were. If it was someone affiliated with you (e.g. family, party member, etc.), you would keep control. Otherwise, the Suvonian Union could be controlled by an NPC.

@chesskid I did PM you about it.

[izakthegoomba]

It depends whether they were also supporting you. If not, an NPC takes power.

Come to that, you would still be president of Arnor (currently controlled by your second-in-command), and could control it until the second lot of elections, at least.

[izakthegoomba]

It's fine for kiwi to play some relative of Kiwieagle II, I just can't have him retrospectively writing a backstory.

[izakthegoomba]

In

Astariel I

, the citizens are fairly happy with

The Suvonian Union

, as it will give them democracy for the first time since the downfall of Robotnick and the invasion of Chesstopia.

In

The Kiwani Republic

, most of the people are even more pleased than the

Astarians

- the fact that the

SU

is already beginning to repair the damage done meant they took little more persuasion.

However, the

Chesstopians

are much less happy with the

SU

. Many of them felt loyal to the Chesskid family, given everything Chesskid I and II did for them, and feel somewhat united against what is, in their eyes, an invasion. The general feeling is one of resentment and dislike, but some of the more extreme edges of the population clearly loathe the new government, and there is even talk of riots...

---

President Animorpher of

Fallen Angels

was returning home from the trial of Kiwieagle II, when on his private jet, when it came under attack from several unmarked, heavily armed enemy aircraft. They quickly took out several vital systems, forcing the plane to make an emergency landing on neutral ground. Several armed groups moved in, killing or incapacitating the guards, and capturing Animorpher, taking him away on a plane...

[izakthegoomba]

Note: the bird flu is still out there, I just haven't had a moment to do an update about it.

@T-Bone, kiwi, has SleepyKrew really been sending you private QT links? If so, why have I not hear about this before?

[izakthegoomba]

@inspi since this game started, I've noticed a whole load of things wrong, and that's one of them. While it would be great to do that, there's no reason to fix this over a number of other issues - and I can't change the rules every few days to fix everything.

Also, if there is another trial... well, that's one thing I

can

fix.

Some kind of update coming later.

[izakthegoomba]

In

Fallen Angels

, the quarantine imposed by the universities and foreign armies has almost entirely stopped the new Bird Flu spreading. The few who have caught it have quickly been separated from the general public.

In

Caledonia

, it is also having less effect than expected.

Meanwhile, scientists are still working on a new vaccine.

For Fallen Angels, 200 died.
For Caledonia, 4,700 died.

-----

President Animorpher is being held captive and awaiting trial.

Caledonia

has issued a statement saying that his bail will cost £2,000,000,000, and that he will be released into the custody of the nation that pays it. It also warned that, should he evade trial, the nation that paid the bail will be held responsible.

-----

N's

plans to make a giant tanning machine, capable of tanning entire nations, was severely set back after the attack from

Chesstopia

. However, the facility making it was not near any cities, and so was almost entirely unharmed.

The machine is now finished. It uses several blimps to float across a large city over a few days.

-----

The nuclear power project is still proceeding well, with multiple power plants in both

Draconia

and

Arnor

, and several more planned.

-----

Finally, after ages of planning and slow developments, Mafiascum's Awesome Society of Astronauts has announced the beginning of it's space programme. They intend to send several unmanned missions into orbit over a period of time, then gradually test sending small animals into space. Eventually, they intend to send shuttles to both of Planet MafiaScum's moons.

-----

The reveal that Chesskid XVIII actively blocked

Chestopia's

involvement in the

SU

has had a varied effect on the former nation. Some of the citizens have been somewhat mollified by this, while others are even more enraged.

Some are starting to actively protest against the new leaders...

[izakthegoomba]

If there's another trial, we'll just run it alongside the game.

[izakthegoomba]

Actually, that's a really good idea. Much better than a QT.

In other news, Animorpher is en route to Draconia. His fate is now in the hands of President JDGA until Caledonia organises the trial.

[izakthegoomba]

In

Chesstopia

, the number of protestors on the streets is growing every day. Most of them are staying relatively peaceful, but there have already been several instances of officials coming under attack.

-----

Since the world was much better prepared this time, the Bird Flu is quickly dying off.

For Fallen Angels, 100 died.
For Caledonia, 700 died.

-----

News reporters gathered as the

Caledonian

plane landed in

Draconia

, but what happened next was rather unexpected. A large box marked "Air Mail" was unloaded, and quickly driven to the President's house. Bomb teams were at the ready, but it's contents turned out to be far simpler than that. Inside the box was an unhappy President Animorpher, wrapped in brown paper and sent to

Draconia

by air mail.

[izakthegoomba]

Whoops, left something out:

Queen Tragedy has left

Caledonia

, travelling to

Melodica

, a long-standing ally of

N's

[izakthegoomba]

In Chesstopia, the protests are slowly crossing a line and becoming riots. There do seem to be leaders within the rioters, but they will not negotiate with the authorities.

-----

The universities have perfected a vaccine for the second strain of the Bird Flu, but because it is dying out anyway, there isn't even a point to putting it into mass production.

For Fallen Angels, 100 died.
For Caledonia, 700 died.

-----

President Animorpher was shaken, but unhurt, during the journey. He is currently staying in Draconia, and plans to return to Fallen Angels soon.

However, his trial is still coming on fast...

The trial can start at pretty much any time, and will take place in a separate thread. T-Bone will be the prosecution, and need to PM me the charges. He can give evidence and statements publicly in the court.

[izakthegoomba]

Yes, you can arrest them.

[izakthegoomba]

That's a shame. Would you like me to do something "exciting" in Draconia?

[izakthegoomba]

In

Chesstopia

, authorities have moved in and arrested the leaders of the riots, who are now awaiting trial. However, the riots haven't been calmed at all by this.

-----

Sorry about post #0, I'll fix it when I get time.

[izakthegoomba]

After Kiwihawk III ordered the assassination (which failed) of a senior

Suvonian Union

politition, he has become even less popular.

-----

The riots in

Chesstopia

are no better. A number of people have been injured, and some serious damage has been caused.

[izakthegoomba]

IT LIVES!

-----

In other news, the

Chesstopian

riots are in full swing, as the police and the army try to contain them. A number of people have been arrested for criminal damage and assault, but the vast majority of the rioters are still free.

[izakthegoomba]

CSL has been prodded
Updated the Playerlist
Xanatos should be doing the money sometime soon

[izakthegoomba]

Today, the

Suvonian Union

made another announcement; that

Astariel

would be joining back together under a common rule, and becoming a state of the

SU

. It will be governed by a senior

Astarian

politician from

Astariel III

(formerly a part of

Arnor

), and will elect it's own leader when the other countries do.

-----

The foreign armies have left

Chesstopia

. Without their support, the native army have become very reluctant to take any action agains the riots, which are now beginning to get out of control again. Some soldiers have even left their jobs and joined the rioters.

[izakthegoomba]

Xanatos seems to have gone AWOL, so your update comes from me this week.

Also, you may have noticed I dropped the "mysteries" post. There were just too many things to put everything in, so I'll deal with hidden information some other way after the game. Which will be difficult, since by inbox is currently 98% full. Time to go deleting all that fluff I've gathered over the last 22 weeks...

Weekly Update - Week 22

Draconia
Gains: £4B
Population grows by: 3,000

Ethernia
Population grows by: 500

Magrathea
Gains: £6B
Population grows by: 3,500

Melodica
Gains: £9B
Population grows by: 4,000

Fallen Angels
Gains: £9B
Population grows by: 5,500

Intibo
Gains: £9B
Population grows by: 5,000

The Suvonian Union
Gains: £45B
Population grows by: 19,500

Calamity Isles
Gains: £12B
Population grows by: 6,000

Alterian Republic
Gains: £16B
Population grows by: 7,500

N
Gains: £4B
Population grows by: 1,500

Caledonia
Gains: £12B
Population grows by: 8,000

[izakthegoomba]

Mist7676 has been prodded. Again. It looks like she might have siteflaked.

[izakthegoomba]

What's wrong with the current map?

[izakthegoomba]

I haven't payed much attention to inbox functions yet, but thanks for the tip.

[izakthegoomba]

In

Draconia

and

Arnor

, a large series of nuclear power plants have just been finished, and are providing power for large sections of the countries. Plans have been made for building more, in the other countries that funded the project, if their governments agree.

-----

A large group of completely unmarked troops arrived at the Deimoskan boundary today. They headed straight for

Caledonia

, their intentions clear; they were damaging the defences as much as possible.

At the same time, several control centres came under attack from unknown soldiers, who were clearly very well trained. They wrecked the controls beyond repair, and a most of the Caledonian anti-missile system is offline. The soldiers fled the area, and technicians are now working continuously to try and restore the defences.

However, the soldiers attacking from the outside had clearly underestimated the defences; traps were sprung, land mines were detonated, bombs were dropped, and turrets gunned down line after line of the advancing troops. The attackers barely managed to scratch the defences before being forced into a retreat.

For the attacking country, 16,800 died.
For Caledonia, 100 died.
Some of Deimoska's defences suffered minor damage.

[izakthegoomba]

While revealing what was said privately is fine, linking to private QTs without their user's permission is akin to quoting a PM. If JDGA had not already linked to that, kiwi would be kicked out.

[izakthegoomba]

I'll be away this weekend, so I'm leaving Xanatos in charge.

[izakthegoomba]

I might not. It depends whether the BastardAdmin here kicks me off the wi-fi.

[izakthegoomba]

When news escaped that the defence systems were offline, an enormous barrage of missiles headed straight to

Caledonia

. The first wave hit the defences hard, with the part of the anti-missile system which remained active only destroying around a third of the threat.

The defences took serious damage.

However, just before the defence systems were damaged beyond repair, the technicians managed to bring the systems back online. From that point onwards, almost all of the incoming missiles were taken out long before they hit the ground.

On the ground, the troops were joined by another group just as large, estimated at around 19,000, who joined the attack. However, they were still fighting a losing battle - the defences had clearly been designed to hold off such an attack, and the soldiers couldn't advance their front line at all.

For the attackers, 14,200 died.

[izakthegoomba]

OP update soon, then a daily update.

Weekly Update - Week 23

Draconia
Gains: £5B
Population grows by: 5,000

Ethernia
Population grows by: 500

Magrathea
Gains: £7B
Population grows by: 4,000

Melodica
Gains: £9B
Population grows by: 4,000

Fallen Angels
Gains: £10B
Population grows by: 5,000

Intibo
Gains: £10B
Population grows by: 5,000

The Suvonian Union
Gains: £48B
Population grows by: 20,000

Calamity Isles
Gains: £12B
Population grows by: 6,000

Alterian Republic
Gains: £16B
Population grows by: 7,000

N
Gains: £5B
Population grows by: 2,000

Caledonia
Gains: £12B
Population grows by: 8,000

[izakthegoomba]

Ok, everyone, I'm about to go through a big backlog of PMs. I'll be sending answers and info as and when I need to, so don't pester me with "you told me X but not Y waaaaaaah".

[izakthegoomba]

Well, here's something I wasn't expecting when I started this...



Even as I type this, I've got another PM. Please, make it stop!

[izakthegoomba]

I know, ani. I'm about to do that. But it won't help the situation (which happens every couple of weeks or so) where I have to go through literally HUNDREDS of PMs to find one tiny little detail. I have to spend time weeding out the fluff.

[izakthegoomba]

After being forced into a retreat by the traps and defences, the attacking army is being torn apart by machine gun turrets. They never stood a chance.

5,300 died.

[izakthegoomba]

The attackers made a valiant effort, but their assault still barely scarred Deimoska. Most of them are dead or too badly hurt to fight.

900 died.

[izakthegoomba]

In

Chesstopia

, everyone was having a pretty good day. The sun was shining... actually, in Suvonia, it hardly ever stops shining. A bunch of people were trying to kick up a riot in the capital, but hey, who cares? No self-respecting Chesstopian is going to let a little thing like that spoil their day. Anyway, there was this really cute kitten called Bertie, owned by a middle-aged Nurse, in a town not far from the border. He was white with black patches, and had a tendency to jump on the heads of random passers-by. One day, he jumped on the head of a man who had a wig, and ripped it clean off. As the man chased the kitten down the road to retrieve the wig, a Daycop wandered past. He saw that, normally hidden by the wig, the man had a strange tattoo on his bald head. Having studied religion in college, the Daycop immediately took this to mean something. After many hours of deliberation, he came to the conclusion that this man must be a Cultist! He set out to find a Pschologist to try and cure the man. Unfortunately, Psychologists cure Serial Killers, not Cultists, so upon visiting the Cultist, he got recruited into the cult. A bit disturbed by all this, the Daycop reported the incident to the Chief of Police. However, this obvious open communication alerted the Godfather to the Chief's existence, and he sent a Goon to kill him. Interestingly enough, the Godfather was rather elderly, and probably going to die any day. This created quite a power struggle within the Mafia, with the Roleblocker and the Rolecop each trying to rally their own faction. It didn't help that there was a pack of Werewolves and the aforementioned Cult trying to take over the town at the same time. Anyway, back to the kitten named Bertie. He got away from the Cultist, and hid the wig in a dustbin, before returning to the Nurse. She had seen the earlier commotion from her bedroom window, and was surprised that Bertie didn't still have the wig. That was when the Cultist arrived, demanding that he have the wig back. Just then, a Vigilante turned up to see what the noise was about, and shot the Cultist for disturbing the neighbours, getting blood all over a rather expensive Persian rug. Unfortunely for the Vigilante, the Nurse turned out to be a Werewolf, and proceeded to eat him. At this point, the Moderator got bored with writing random crap, and dropped a meteor on the village. It's all gone now, so he doesn't care that it was a terrible story anyway. If you ask really nicely, he might go update the OP.

[izakthegoomba]

The army attacking Deimoska was wrecked, with the troops being forced back out of Deimoska. Just when it seemed their lives couldn't get any worse, missiles streaked across from Caledonia, and smashed into the troops' camps, devastating the remains of the army.

2,100 died.

-----

Another barrage of missiles flew through the air, this time coming from the Caledonian outpost at Lake Occulus, and directly attacking Fallen Angels, wrecking the border and it's limited defences.

100 died.

[izakthegoomba]

It was, until about 20 minutes ago. Something screwed up.

...

I'll go work on it.

[izakthegoomba]

Ok, I've deleted all the fluff in pages 9 and 10, so I now have space for a grand total of 51 more PMs!

Fun fact: I figured out, from the post numbers in the URLs, that the PMs I get make up a very significant portion of all the PMs sent on this site.

[izakthegoomba]

I did that, but it broke. I'll be making another one.

Edit: it's working now. Still, it's a shame I can't delete my Inbox and put the messages in a personal archive.

[izakthegoomba]

That was the appetiser; prepare for the main course.

As the first attack, generally accepted to be the work of

Fallen Angels

, was finally crushed, a far greater force approached.

Huge numbers of troops poured out of

Intibo

, heading for

Caledonia

. There were easily 300,000 of them, possibly many more.

When they launched their assault, they did a far better job than the preceding army. Keeping to a tight path, they made a beeline for

Caledonia

. The entered the Deimoskan mountains fairly easily, but quickly ran into trouble. In the unfamiliar and mostly unmapped terrain, many of them were easy targets for the numerous defence turrets and traps in the region. Their progress was slowed even further by new defences they hadn't expected, like huge trenches, expansive minefields, and thick hedges of barbed wire. They suffered huge numbers of casualties. Those that survive are slowly making progress, inching towards

Caledonia

.

For Intibo, around 190,000 died.

-----

President Mist of

Intibo

has done something incredibly stupid. She stood on top of a plane and threw £1B in mixed notes into the air. And she fell off.

Mist7676 is DEAD.

[izakthegoomba]

Mist isn't out of the game. Unless she wants to be.

[izakthegoomba]

I know the death figures aren't realistic, but this is just a game. High death tolls seem to work ok, and even if they didn't, I have to be consistent.

However, I'll put it on The List™.

[izakthegoomba]

Intibo's

army has suffered heavy casualties, but has pushed through the thickest part of the Deimoskan defences. The bulk of the army is now approaching

Caledonia

, clearly preparing for an attack.

For Intibo, 20,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

Mist, you don't have to leave.

Update coming in the foreseeable future.

[izakthegoomba]

Sometimes, this game just seems like a test of synonyms. Anyway, here's the update.

-----

As

Intibo's

army drew close to the border of

Caledonia

, it came face to face with a solid wall of soldiers, armed with powerful flamethrowers. The two armies quickly came to a stalemate, with

Intibo's

troops unable to come close without being devastated by the flamethrowers, and

Caledonia's

troops unable to effectively fight them off from a distance.

Meanwhile, a huge army approached from

Melodica

, following in the previous attack's footsteps. With the defences damaged by

Intibo's

troops, this attack took less of a battering, but still suffered heavy losses.

For Intibo, 4,000 died.
For Melodica, 42,000 died.
For Caledonia, 1,500 died.

And yes, a name change is allowed, I just haven't got around to putting it in the OP yet.

[izakthegoomba]

The terrain makes it very difficult to attack, so the Caledonians have a natural advantage.

[izakthegoomba]

Because there's no-one who needs to be replaced. You're second on the list.

[izakthegoomba]

I'm not replacing someone into the Ethernia slot. It's wrecked, and has a tiny population. Kiwani, I might allow in a few weeks, since it is at least being repaired.

Since inspi's ok with it, I'll replace people into Chesstopia's and Astariel's slots, if they don't mind being part of the Union.

[izakthegoomba]

What posts?

[izakthegoomba]

Only if Blackberry, Kcdaspot, and Drench all refuse the slots.

@CSL I'm updating the OP in a few hours, I'll do it then.

[izakthegoomba]

As the troops from

Wei

arrived to join the

Intibans

, the army of

Caledonia

truly stepped up to defend against the invasion. Huge numbers of troops surged forward to engage the approaching army, while missiles streaked from behind them, wrecking enemy camps. The battle was only going one way...

As they fought, yet another army approached from a similar path, taking advantage of the wrecked defences. The 300,000 troops from

Fallen Angels

are quickly coming up behind the battle, suffering few losses on their way.

For Intibo, 16,000 died, 66,000 remain fighting.
For Wei, 31,000 died, 301,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 26,000 died, 274,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 30,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

Blackberry said he didn't mind, and Kcdaspot can have first pick.

Kcdaspot is now leader of Chesstopia.
Blackberry is now leader of Astariel.

I'll consider opening up the Republic of Kiwani and Mistotopia slots in the near future.

[izakthegoomba]

I won't have Internet access tomorrow evening and Xanatos seems to have vanished, so someone else is posting the weekly update.

[izakthegoomba]

RedPanda isn't co-mod (he's on the replacements list!), I just asked him to help me out this week.

Update and stuff tonight.

[izakthegoomba]

There's a few reasons I agree that Gurinland needs more countries, so I'm letting Fallen Angels and Intibo expand into old countries and give a slot to a replacement.

-----

The four old nations of Gurinland are not as badly damaged as had been feared - the biggest issue is that society has completely broken down, and it will take some work to reinstate order.

-----

In Deimoska, the war rages on. As the tide turned against them, the armies from

Wei

and

Fallen Angels

suddenly went into a hasty retreat.

But as they ran from the fight,

Caledonia's

army, which is much more familiar with the area, and doesn't have to contend with the defences, easily flanked them, trapping them in the mountains.

As the were slowly forced back to the fight,

N's

giant tanning devices floated overhead, in a fleet of airships. They were pointed directly at the attacking armies.

For Intibo, 19,000 died, 47,000 remain fighting.
For Wei, 39,000 died, 262,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 36,000 died, 238,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 34,000 died.

The attacking troops (and a few Caledonian ones who got caught in the crossfire) are now dark orange. Some have got quite ill, and they can all expect to die of cancer in a few years.

[izakthegoomba]

The replacement list is RIGHT HERE.

Drench, RedPanda, kiwieagle, kdowns

Freaky, huh?

[izakthegoomba]

theamatuer will be joining as our new co-mod, as soon as I get some stuff sorted out. Third time lucky, right?

---

As the war went on and the tanning machines continued to damage the attacking forces, a barrage of missiles streaked in from outside Deimoska. Most of them were destroyed by the anti-missile system, but with the defences damaged, several made it through. They hit the floating tanning machines, sending them crashing to the ground, until only three of the fleet of twenty remained in the air.

But still, the fight continues...

For Intibo, 14,000 died, 33,000 remain fighting.
For Wei, 37,000 died, 225,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 35,000 died, 203,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 31,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

After ages of planning and manufacturing, MASA has announced that they plan to launch their first space mission in [1 rl-week]. They will be sending an unmanned shuttle into orbit, having it circle the planet three times, and landing it in the ocean north of Suvonia.

After this, they plan to launch some longer missions, working up to sending humans into space.

-----

Several more missiles shot into the air, this time from within the mountains, and took out the three remaining tanning machines before the anti-missile system had a chance to respond

Wei's

remaining troops have laid down their weapons, and are being escorted out of Deimoska. For

Fallen Angels

and

Intibo

, the fight goes on.

For Intibo, 9,000 died, 24,000 remain fighting.
For Wei, 1,000 died, the rest have left Deimoska.
For Fallen Angels, 31,000 died, 172,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 28,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

Bullets don't take sides.

[izakthegoomba]

Correction: nobody else ever wants wants to write the speeches. If this game ever gets a re-run or a sequel or something, it will be mandatory to write your own speeches.

OP update soon.

[izakthegoomba]

The war in Deimoska goes on, but the attacking armies are losing the will to go on. They see thousands of their fellow soldiers cut down every day, and know it will be their turn soon.

Caledonia's

army, however, is fighting as hard as ever, and quickly pushing the enemy back out of their region.

For Intibo, 10,000 died, 14,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 36,000 died, 126,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 19,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

Hi, everyone. I just got out of hospital a few hours ago; I've managed to break my collarbone, and I can't move my arm for a few weeks. I'm hoping I can keep up with this site, and I will definitely keep modding this, but flavour text and OP updates will be pretty sparse.

Thankfully, theamatuer will be handling the weekly updates.

[izakthegoomba]

theamatuer, I think that would just overcomplicate things, but thanks for the offer.

-----

The invaders continue to retreat in the face of blistering firepower.

For Intibo, 4,000 died, 10,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 32,000 died, 94,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 16,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

Although the world is indeed round, it is uncertain how far apart Suvonia and Deimoska are by sea. That's the downside of not making a map at the start

Chronologically challenged update:

-----

The invasion is being crushed, and the armies pushed back to the edge of the mountains.

For Intibo, 2,000 died, 8,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 23,000 died, 71,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 5,000 died.

[izakthegoomba]

Sorry zor, signups closed a while back. You can join the replacements list if you like - we could be getting some free slots soon.

[izakthegoomba]

It used to be in the first post, but I killed it.

[izakthegoomba]

Yeah, chesskid's back.

[izakthegoomba]

Really sorry everything's taking so long.

Old iPod + outdated OS + buggy browser + long complicated OP update + limited time = not fun.

[izakthegoomba]

Today,

Chesstopia

has declared that it is leaving the SU, and becoming an independent nation again. All SU officials have been told to leave the country, while the government waits for the council to respond...

-----

In Deimoska the armies are still fighting, but the

Caledonian

forces have almost won. The invaders are right back at the Deimoskan border, and aren't even trying to advance any more.

For Intibo, 1,000 died, 7,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 9,000 died, 62,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 3,000 died.

-----

In

Fallen Angels

, the families of those who have died in Deimoska received letters, with the army dog-tags of their dead relatives...

Dear Loved Ones,

I'm sorry to inform you that the person who these dog-tags bear has been killed in battle, attempting to invade Caledonia. Unfortunately this proved to be an impossible task that your President Animorpher has sent them to do. Please, if you're upset that President Animorpher sent your loved ones to die for no reason, you need to tell him your disdain. Do not let president Ani break up any other Fallen Angels families.

With regards,
Secretary Williams

[izakthegoomba]

*cries*

Fix'd

[izakthegoomba]

Edited the update a bit. Not really theamatuer's fault, just Chesstopia and some stuff I forgot to mention.

[izakthegoomba]

What's wrong with it?

[izakthegoomba]

I c wat u did thar

[izakthegoomba]

Mist7676 and Blackberry have been prodded. Killerjester has siteflaked.

[izakthegoomba]

Drench replaces Killerjester.

[izakthegoomba]

Third.

[izakthegoomba]

You guys all flooded my second inbox until it filled up, then the third, and then Korikai ganged up and started a nuclear war against Deimoska. Then Flay told me off for using so much server space, and Hoopla threatened to take me off the Modding queue if I didn't behave. Then ani, chesskid, and SKrew turned out to be Mafioso and they turned up on my doorstep with guns and stuff. Then I woke up.

-----

The war in Deimoska continues, but the invaders have completely lost the spirit to fight in this hopeless campaign.

For Intibo, 2,000 died, 5,000 remain fighting.
For Fallen Angels, 10,000 died, 52,000 remain fighting.
For Caledonia, 2,000 died.

-----

After seemingly endless months of planning, Mafiascum's Awesome Society of Astronauts (MASA) have successfully launched their first unmanned satellite from a site in Draconia, after a speech from the director of MASA.

The satellite is now orbiting the planet, and is expected to land somewhere west of Korikai in a few weeks (rl-days).

[izakthegoomba]

President Mist of

Intibo

has been forcibly taken into a mental institute after making plans to waste the country's money committing suicide, televise herself doing so, and demanding that the government of the Calamity Isles take control of her country. She is being assessed by the very best psychologists available, but rumours are flying across the country.

[izakthegoomba]

I do read this thread, you know.

[izakthegoomba]

Bump. I'm collecting files, figuring out what to do next, etc.

[izakthegoomba]

Ugh, sorry this has taken so long. I'll put up links to the recovered content later. Assuming there's enough interest to continue, the basic situation is this:

Magrathea is in ruins, Chesstopia is surrounded by a number of radioactive mushroom clouds, the Caledonian leadership has been ousted, President Drench is in prison, and a huge Chesstopian army is set up near Deimoska.

[izakthegoomba]

And I have no idea how much everyone should have. I mean, who cares about money in a post-apopcalyptic world, mirite?

Well, for want of a better word... SHIT.

...

I'll have a look at the cached stuff when I get to a real computer, and see if I can find a recent money post.

YOU FORGOT THE PART WHERE T-BONE IS DEAD

the Caledonian leadership has been ousted

[izakthegoomba]

Inspi, your link doesn't even contain a page 300, so... wut?

[izakthegoomba]

Ugh, sorry about this, I suddenly ended up with waaaay less access than I was expecting. Here's the files if you want them.

But the fact that I've come back to no actions, and no posts makes me wonder if there's any point continuing? Come on, help me out here.

[izakthegoomba]

Actually, he is at the moment, but there's an update coming soon.

[izakthegoomba]

Ok, I'm just going to carry on and see how this goes.

---

Radiation is slowly spreading across Chesstopia, but the government is taking actions to protect it's population. It has allocated £10B to be spent on distributing anti-radiation drugs, and relocating refugees to Chesstropolis - being directly in the centre of Chesstopia and in need of inhabitants, it is the safest place in the country.

The fallout is also drifting across the rest of Suvonia, but the Union governments have been just as fast - those closest to Chesstopia have been evacuated, and anti-radiation drugs are being sent to vulnerable areas.

For Chesstopia, 60,000 died.
For the Suvonian Union, 4,000 died.

---

A huge section of the Chesstopian air force was sent to Magrathea, where they carpet bombed airstrips, military bases, missile silos, harbours, government buildings, and all other important structures. The battered remains of Magrathea's government has been obliterated, and it's military force has been reduced to rubble. The country has descended into anarchy.

Robotnick2,

Foolish Nuke-wielding Townie

, was blown up Day 316

Chesstopia has made it known that anyone accepting refugees from Magrathea or trying to help the country will earn themselves the enmity of Chesstopia. This will last until everyone even closely related to the attack on Chesstopia is dead. If the citizens of Magrathea show themselves properly remorseful by lynching said responsible people themselves, Chesstopia might help with the eventual rebuilding.

---

Meanwhile, in Caledonia, a new government has taken control. Naturally, it claims to have the interests of it's people, and Deimoska, at heart, but the public is not happy about it. Several protests have broken out in major cities, with rumour of full riots...

[izakthegoomba]

Ok, so I just went to try and restore the main OP from the caches, and all I have is the hex. Does anyone have a way of converting it, or a proper recent version?

[izakthegoomba]

It's better than nothing.

[izakthegoomba]

Thanks inspi, but I'll try to get the more recent one first. I think I did a BIG update just after that.

[izakthegoomba]

I've got the html now, I just need to put it the OP somehow.

(though frankly, nobody's doing anything even when I do post an update. I'll send a mass prod or something, but I'm not optimistic about this.)

[izakthegoomba]

Ok, the info is there, I'll format it and stuff this evening.

[izakthegoomba]

Ok guys. This has been great fun, but I'm calling it off now. I think the game was stagnating already, and the crash just really nuked everyone's enthusiasm about it - including my own. Thank you all for making this such a great experience, and I hope to see you in the sequel.

I'll be typing up some kind of summary, so I'd appriciate it if those of you who know what's been going on keep quite about it until then. Particularly inspi, plague, and chess...

[izakthegoomba]

Izak from the future cutting in: WARNING. YOU MAY FEEL A SUDDEN URGE TO RAGE AT SOME OR ALL OF THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION. PLEASE SUPPRESS SAID URGES.

Ok. This will be kinda hard to explain, but I'll give it a go.

Throughout the game, there have been five key players - inspi, chesskid, T-Bone, JDGA and plague.

Inspi took the full political and espionage route. Right from the start, he was undermining everyone else's efforts. All that money on upkeep? The vast majority of it was secretly going on getting spies right in under the noses of everyone else's governments, and making sure nobody else could do the same. He was also working on political situations very actively, hence the formation of the SU. He essentially took a whole continent for himself.

Chesskid very obviously and publicly went full-on military. Chesstopia's firepower was insane. Almost nothing would have survived if Chesstopia had decided to go on a killing spree. Deimoska's defences might have held up for a while, but Chess would probably have won out in the end.

T-Bone played very defensively. He kept Caledonia - and the rest of Deimoska - under tight control, and incredibly well defended. It really sucks that he had to go the way that he did... but more on that later.

JDGA played a very guarded game. He was developing nukes from really early - and most of the bombs you saw flying around were his doing. His plan was, if I recall correctly, "wait for someone to attack me, and if they're winning, plunge the world into a nuclear winter".

Plague was like Chesskid, but actually better in some ways. He built up an incredibly powerful navy, which would have held against any attack for a VERY LONG TIME. He started developing nukes pretty early, and by the end of the game, he had a huge stockpile of nuclear ICBMs. But unlike Chess, he kept all this pretty quiet and calm. Even when he was outed as having nukes, nobody made much of a fuss.

Those five were all in with a decent chance of winning (or, in JDGA's case, psuedo-winning through defiance). Other people did good stuff too, but not really enough to have a chance. Robotnick gets an honorable mention, but he really got going far too late to be a nuclear threat.

So let's go through some of the big events.

The nukes sent from Mistotopia were not nukes, and they were not from Mistotopia. They were cunningly-designed fakes, sent out by kiwieagle.

The nuking of Chesstopia was down to inspi - and an unwitting plague. Inspi somehow got plague to give him detailed instructions and blueprints to make a nuclear bomb. Inspi did so and, making use of his incredible connections across the world, got it into Chesstopia, where it exploded.

After that, Inspi secretly took over Chesstopia, under the guise of NPCs. It was particularly funny to see Chesskid approving of Mr. Notch so thorough when Mr. Notch was actually Mr. Inspi...

Inspi then used his own connections, combined with the threat of an attack from Chesstopia, to politically destroy Caledonia. Then he quietly took over. There were going to be speeches and stuff. He can post them if he wants.

And finally, T-Bone was indeed responisble for the Bird Flu outbreak. I consider this to be one of my greatest failings in modding this game; it was far too easier for him to make it, and it killed far too many people. But hey, learn from mistakes and stuff... hopefully the sequel will be more balanced.

I know there's a ton of other things, so feel free to ask. If I don't know (or can't remember), chances are someone else will.

So once again, a huge thank you to everyone who helped make this game such an enormous success. We've had plenty of issues, so please give me any feedback, good or bad. It really helps.

[izakthegoomba]

Really?

Who told you that?

PEdit: well, you did a great job of staying alive throughout... but while inspi was a Cult Leader and Chesskid was a Serial Killer, you were more of a Survivor.

[izakthegoomba]

also I don't approve of autolossing people

That's a bit rich, considering you autolossed... what was it? Four players?

What would have happened in the end with my massively huge nuclear bomb attack?

Chesstopia would have been in serious trouble, and a bunch of people would have died, but it would probably have survived. I would have advised theamatuer to drop Chesstopia's money down to almost nothing for a while, and to give everyone else a bit of a dip.

[izakthegoomba]

@Izak,

Forgot this?

I asked you a few times if you wanted me to end the game for you and you said that it could continue...

Yeah. Inspi could have had everyone killed off by saying "execute order 66".

And I wanted this to continue. I really did. But when there's no commitment or enthusiasm from myself, my co-mod, and the majority of the players, carrying on would have been stupid. (I don't blame any of you, this has probably been waaaaaay too dragged out)

[izakthegoomba]

plague and I were allies

Actually, not quite. While you were quietly taking over Deimoska, plague was trying to secretly suppress your efforts. I think he wanted the world for himself...

[izakthegoomba]

Yeah, I thought you were a bit out-of-character there...

To be honest, inspi was going to win this. No contest. Caledonia was essentially under his control (plague had some influence, but not enough to do anything). N would have been an easy target for invasion. The Alterian Republic had some nuclear weaponry, but nothing that could even scratch inspi. Magrathea was finished, it had used the last of it's nukes on Chesstopia. Draconia would have put up a fight, but chances are inspi's spies could have stalled them for long enough to invade/use Chesstopia to blow them up. The rest of Korikai and Gurinland could have put up a decent fight if they'd grouped up, but at best they would have just made a big wreck of things. Plague would have had a fighting chance, but war with Chesstopia while your government is infiltrated by the same people behind Chesstopia? Ouch.

[izakthegoomba]

I tried to act indifferent toward the game ending or continuing, actually. I think in a game where the mod could essentially end it within a month, or make it last for years, it's important.

But yeah, the SU wasn't undefended, and it was MASSIVE compared to anything else Chesstopia had attacked. It took quite a hit, but another barrage or two would have been needed to truly cripple it.

[izakthegoomba]

You bailed right at the start, didn't you?

[izakthegoomba]

I'm going to have to limit the number of spaces in the sequel much more strictly than I did here, and I expect demand will outweigh supply. I don't know how I'm going to pick people, but I can't have everyone that wants to play.

[izakthegoomba]

Planet MafiaScum 2 is quite a long way off, so I've decided to do something else in the meantime. I hope you all enjoy!

[izakthegoomba]

It's complicated... partly NPC, partly SleepyKrew (as player, non-player and co-mod), partly nothing in particular.

[izakthegoomba]

Maybe. I'll probably do applications or something, they seem pretty popular now. But you'll all be given a chance at getting /in.

[izakthegoomba]

MAYBE

DEPENDS IF I LIKE THE SOUND OF THE RANDOM DOUCHES

[izakthegoomba]

I can see it will be a fun game...

[izakthegoomba]

Fast forward a few months

The Calamity Isles and Suvonian Union have perfected nuclear fusion; they now draw nearly all their energy from the completely clean source that requires a negligible amount of fuel. The Suvonian Union then started spending a lot of its income in helping MASA. The first manned mission to MafiaMars is about to be launched. It has with it all the materials needed to build a permanent research station and do some terraforming. For some reason president JDGA of Draconia demanded to be part of the crew, pointing to Draconia’s massive investments to get his way.

JDGA was sitting in a conference room close to the launch pad with several ministers, a mad gleam in his eye. “Bring in

The Suitcase

” he ordered. “Now I will launch all our nukes at the rest of the world, everyone will die while I will be safe on MafiaMars”. His minister of internal affairs spoke up while the rest just nodded dumbly: “But sir, won’t the other countries retaliate? They’ll destroy Draconia in response. ” “Didn’t you hear me, I’ll be in space, I won’t notice a thing BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA”. The rest kept nodding dumbly.
An aide came in with The Suitcase, standing behind the president while he opened it with the key around his neck to get to the launch computer. JDGA was so preoccupied with his victory that he didn’t notice the aide putting his hands on his neck…

SNAP

JDGA, Nuke-Wielding Wannabe Evil-Mastermind had his neck snapped day 355

“This is a coup, although it is better than the alternative, don’t you think?” The aide said, before drawing a silenced handgun and shooting all the ministers in the chest. After checking that all the others were dead, he came up to the internal affairs minister and shot him a thumbs up, getting one in return despite the shoulder wound. Then he left the room.

---

At the same time in all the major cities around the world holograms appeared of an unrecognisable hooded man who spoke the words that would end an era: “Execute Order 66”.

---

In Draconia, most of the top politicians were already dead; they were followed by generals and administrators all over the country. What was left would be rallied by the former minister of internal affairs, who had miraculously survived.

---

In Magrathea the lynch mobs that were still prowling the streets in response to Chesstopia’s declaration suddenly started finding the locations of the bunkers where their targets were hiding… It was messy.

---

Wu lost its king CSL and every single heir, together with all their most loyal administrators, in a single day, almost no one has any idea what to do, only a few select parties that are in opposition to the king are still organized enough to take power.

CSL, King of Wu, was dayvigged day 355

---

In Lanthiria only the president was assassinated, found stabbed to death in his bed, the culprit wasn’t found and the vice-president took over. The strange thing is that every party, even the opposition, seems okay with this… Almost like they all secretly have the same agenda. The conspiracy theorists that say this are ignored however.

Nexus, President of Lanthiria, stabbed to death day 355

---

In Freyyil the High Councilor, eight Elders, four Judges, five Priests and 2 Generals were found murdered, in some cases together with several of their chosen successors. A new High Councilor has been chosen from their midst and the country isn’t expected to suffer a major breakdown like some others.

DonJosh, High Councilor, shot in public day 355

---

King RedPanda of Amyr, together with most of his children and grandchildren, was murdered in cold blood by palace staff today. His third son’s wife and 2 year old son survived. She is now ruling the country as Regentess Konchu Panda II, until her son is old enough to rule.

RedPanda, king of Amyr, massacred day 355

---

Fallen Angels and The Red Terror of Peaceful Kittens were decimated, barely anyone in a position of leadership survived, president Animorpherv did, but he is severely wounded and won’t leave the hospital for months. Those that did formed an emergency council, it is expected that the Amyr government will shortly take over as the formal government of the GU.

Kiwieagle, President of RToPK, stabbed in the back day 355

---

While N was still mourning the suicide of former president Tragedy and the parliament was discussing who to elect in the interim between now and the next elections, a large part of the members of parliament were assassinated at night. The rest of them have come together in an emergency meeting and elected a new leader in record time to deal with the crisis.

Tragedy, Site-Flaked President of N, committed suicide somewhere before day 355

---

In Caledonia several leaders of the new council died, this has really only served more to regain a sense of unity than in destabilizing the country. Chesstopian troops were guarding several key buildings and killed the assassins there before they could strike, further cement their position as people that aren’t there to suppress the people, but just to act as a police force.

---

After the massive upheaval due to Chesstopian occupation of the Alterean Republic after the elections, it was mostly spared in the murder department. This was a good thing as some still couldn’t believe that the Chesstopian ambassador had won them. The campaign using pictures of Drench pissing in public followed by footage of Magrathea, next to the Chesstopian presidential candidate and footage of Chesstopian soldiers peacefully interacting with Caledonian citizens and the words ‘You can choose’ proved surprisingly effective.

---

President Plague survived his assassination attempt; he was apparently tipped off about an attempt of his own life and locked himself in a safe-room. His advisors and cabinet weren’t so lucky, but with the figurehead still there a new government was quickly established. No one knows why Plague is always acting so nervous around his supposedly trusted advisers though.

---

It appears the increased security after the nuking prevented Chesstopia from getting hit as hard as other nations, attempts on Mr. Notch and Chesskidette were prevented and only a few other officials died.

---

In the Suvonian Union a massive spree of arrests followed the Execute Order 66 message, apparently they figured out who all the assassins were beforehand.

All around the world, 2045 died

“A knife in the dark can do more than a thousand swords at dawn”

---

Epilogue

In the wake of ‘the night of a thousand knives’ multiple countries were in chaos. Those not as severely hit helped the others rebuild their governments. The Gurinland Union expanded to include Ferryl under leadership of Amyr Regent and now Grand Councilor Konchu.

After the Chesstopian government lifted its ban on help to Magrathea, Wu and Draconia both annexed half of it and started a rebuilding effort. Some political maneuvering in the following months ended up with the Calamitian controlled part of Ethernia also becoming part of Draconia.

After secret negotiations between The Calamity Isles’, N’s and Caledonia’s governments, later involving Chesstopia, the Calamitian Protectorate was formed. Chesstopian troops in the occupied countries remained, but a lot of their autonomy was restored while officially they came under the rule of the Calamitian Isles.

Over the years, in response to the formation of these new superpowers, the individual countries left started to band together more, Lanthiria joined the GU while Draconia and Wu joined together. Korikai became the only continental superpower that was not dominated by one of its member nations, the nationality of its leader changing every few years.

In the meantime MafiaMars had been largely terraformed in to a MafiaScum-like planet, it already had natural bodies of water and the formation of an atmosphere caused temperatures to rise to what would be considered normal levels for large parts of MafiaScum. Several colonies had formed utilizing small nuclear fusion plants to provide energy even when a lacking large amounts of resources from MafiaScum.

Fifteen years of relatively amiable peace followed, the status quo changed however when in 15 AOS (After Order Sixty-six) Lady Chesskidette LXXII, now sixteen years old, officially took over leadership from her adoptive father Mr. Notch. The Chesstopians were ecstatic and with thunderous applause… Chesstopia permanently joined the Suvonian Union.

This shifted the balance of power; The Chesstopians had always been opposed to cooperation between countries, but now, with a real CHESSKID back in charge who ordered it they followed eagerly. It turned out that all the other major powers already had made deals among each other for mutual protection, so now nothing stood in the way of world peace.

This culminated in Suvonian Chancellor Inspiratieloos (with Vice Chair/Apprentice Chesskidette), Gurinland Grand Councellor Konchu II and Chief Ambassador Animorpherv (who after surviving his ordeal during Order 66 became a diplomat), Calamitian President Plague and Korikai representative Baldock Jong meeting together on what used to be the site of the Grand University in Arnor and announcing the unification of Planet MafiaScum under

Supreme Chancellor Inspiratieloos

!

inspiratieloos (Dark Lord of MafiaScum), Darth Chesskiddette (NPC Dark Apprentice), plague42 ('Loyal' Luitenant), Lemaness Nicatilpoi (Awesome NPC Spy), and Notch Sedisk (Awesome NPC Spy) won the game.

Animorpherv, Overall nice guy, survived the endgame

“So this is how liberty dies—with thunderous applause."

Thank you all for playing.

[izakthegoomba]

You mean that update? Nah, the game was over anyway. That was just to wrap things up.

The sequel will happen, but it might not be until late this year.

[izakthegoomba]

I still don't get how I spent just as much if not more money on countering exactly what Inspir did, was very strict on how it was done, and he still thwarted me. I was very worried about someone having spies, taking over my country, assassinating my leadership structure, FROM THE BEGINNING, and it was still allowed to happen. I'm one player who won't be playing in your sequel.

I'm sorry about that, but there were two occasions on which I alerted you to the possibility of spies in your country, and you didn't do much about it.

As for the sequel, I wouldn't say that just yet. It will be run very differently to this.

[izakthegoomba]

Because you were spared?

[izakthegoomba]

Because you were spared?

WHAT.

I DON'T KNOW.

[izakthegoomba]

Some things have to be made up on the fly...

[izakthegoomba]

(and Caledonia "wipe out everyone else with Bird Flu while leaving my own citizens miraculously intact")

Also I was amazed nobody brought up the "why is Notch not crushing people" problem.

[izakthegoomba]

I think inspi means the two of you together could have screwed the rest of the world...