Can't sleep, send help

[vizIIsto]

Hello

It's 1.30 in the morning and I can't sleep. I feel fully awake. I couldn't stop thinking of someone and it resulted in me getting insane from my thoughts.
I tried going downstairs but the clock ticks so cloud that it drives me insane too.
This is the first time I feel so awake when I'm supposed to be sleeping.
Since I assume there's some Americans here, all I'd beg for is to be able to find someone to talk too even though it's in the midst of X-mas.
I don't expect anybody to respond, I simply hope.
I'll be scrolling thru the internet for finding things to focus on other than my thoughts.

By the way my patents won't like this at all probably but for once I don't care. I was going insane off my thoughts so I was never falling asleep.

If there's someone with a beeg beeg heart out there, please be my guardian for the night.

Please send halp.

[bugspray]

You are not alone, my sock comrade.

[vizIIsto]

"Location: under the bed"
Is that so true?

[bugspray]

Check and tell me what you find

[vizIIsto]

For the time being I'm just gonna read some random Newbie game to have something innocent to think about. Most of my life is sh*t right now (I will get help w that soon) so I might as well watch a mafia game and then try to fall asleep thinking about that mafia game instead of painful things like "why can't I and my first true love be just simple friends", "Why am I who I am" And, most importantly, "Why can't I fall asleep fgs"

Have you looner under your bed already?

[bugspray]

I will be asleep soon and to reach that place I will breathe and focus only on my breath with my eyes closed and before I know it everything will fade and it will be tomorrow one dream later

[vizIIsto]

Looked, not looner.
Stupid autocorrect just revealed my super secret balloon fetish which up to this point nobody, absolutely nobody, knew about (Looner = balloon fetishist, I use it a lot on YT when looking for blow to pop vids)
I'm sharing WAAAY too much now but hey, at least at 2 am in the morning I can't be anything but spontaneous.

Edit: those are deep thoughts I could not handel.

[vizIIsto]

You know, they say everybody experiences a night like this in their late teenager time where they don't get and sleep, whether deliberate or not.

This might be the start of a new me.

[bugspray]

Close your eyes, breathe in, breathe out, repeat

[vizIIsto]

These deep thoughts are insanely dumb and hilarious. Hopefully someday I will look back at this and be proud of this, or be proud that this mangrave is where I managed to escape from.
Which one is better?

I can't close mah eyes when I have to read your device with my eyes open.

[Kublai Khan]

Hello

It's 1.30 in the morning and I can't sleep. I feel fully awake. I couldn't stop thinking of someone and it resulted in me getting insane from my thoughts.
I tried going downstairs but the clock ticks so cloud that it drives me insane too.
This is the first time I feel so awake when I'm supposed to be sleeping.
Since I assume there's some Americans here, all I'd beg for is to be able to find someone to talk too even though it's in the midst of X-mas.
I don't expect anybody to respond, I simply hope.
I'll be scrolling thru the internet for finding things to focus on other than my thoughts.

By the way my patents won't like this at all probably but for once I don't care. I was going insane off my thoughts so I was never falling asleep.

If there's someone with a beeg beeg heart out there, please be my guardian for the night.

Please send halp.

Let me condense 10,000 articles on how to sleep: Get off the internet and go exercise a bit.

I find it help to kick-start your sleep by dreaming about something. Picture yourself skiing down a mountain and something happens. Tell a narrative.

[vizIIsto]

I'll try to mix 15 mins of internet with 15 mins of trying to sleep. When my mind goes crazy thanks to a thought spiral, I'll get up and see what has happened on the internet, then try again.
One way or the other I should survive the night.

P.S. thx for all the help and I hope my parents won't notice lol

[bugspray]

When you fall asleep your body will form a chrysalis and you will be reborn. This happens in your mind.

[vizIIsto]

My thought process is too complicated maybe. I feel like wanting to write them down because it might help me when help arrives.

[bugspray]

A ritual I have that might suit your current predicament.

Blow a bubble big enough for you to lay in around yourself. Assign it the following properties: the bubbles you are about to create inside of it cannot exit it and are stuck inside until you are done with them.
For each of your worries blow a smaller bubble to float in the larger one. Do this for every little bit pestering your mind.
Enjoy this moment where you are free from your worries. Relax for a bit; everyone deserves to do this, including you.
Reach out and grab one of your worries and breathe it back in. Meditate on it and find a solution to it, soon it will no longer be a worry.
Repeat for the rest of your worries.
Once your bubble is empty again you can suck it back up, pop it, etc

[vizIIsto]

My thinking knows no boundaries my pal. Tried some sleeping but ended up in the same old spiraal.

Thanks for trying to help me get some sleep but I'm afraid it's of little use... sorry for that.

[vizIIsto]

Managed to get thru the night with about 4-6 hours of sleep. Fell asleep at like 4 a.m.
Still thinking of her.
If there was a machine that could write down my thoughts while I think them, I would pay for it with every penny I got so others can get a better understanding how tiring it can be to be a thinker / to be thinking all the time and not being able to escape that thought process (it's the same as telling someone not to think of a pink elephant - they will think of a pink elephant)
Also, if there was a machine that could make me fall instantly asleep, I'd also pay big bucks for it. The most exhausting times for me are when I can't get to sleep because of my ongoing thoughts. Bad things that happen to me irl at least end quickly without thinking too much about it.

[Awoo]

Usually when I can't go outsleep it's because I did nothing but use the computer all day.

You need to do something during the day to earn your sleep. Something physically or mentally taxing. Physically taxing as in taking a pleasant 20 minute stroll. Mentally taxing as in writing a 3 hour calculus exam you're at most 65% prepared for. Note the discrepancy in magnitude of work required and choose wisely.

[Kublai Khan]

If there was a machine that could write down my thoughts while I think them, I would pay for it with every penny I got so others can get a better understanding how tiring it can be to be a thinker

[Psyche]

ah yes a thinker