Worst role ideas?

[xyzzy]

That is such a freaking awesome role.

Srsly.

I think I may actually use that, and many other roles from this thread. I'm preparing a game for another forum called The Island of Stupid Roles.

On a related note, I came up with two totally awesome team ideas:

Underpowered, Disorganized Mafia

They're a larger than average team, because none of them know who their teammates are.

Angsty Emo Kids

A team of jesters. One has to be executed, one night killed, one day killed, and one killed in any manner. They have other powers, too: one is a role blocker can chuck The Nightmare Before Christmas DVDs at other players; the leader stabs people with safety pins.

[xyzzy]

Shakespeare (What a Tragedy!)

Unfortunately, your fate is not good.
Everything you write, be it a vote-
-Or something like a minor suspicion,
Must be written in the way of the good
Shakespeare: Iambic Pentameter! All
Things you type shall appear to readers in
Fourteen lines and a decasyllibic
Way! If you should fail to write like this, why
You shall surely perish in a grim way!
But don't worry, I will probably fail
To count your syllables carefully, so...
I guess it doesn't really matter, now?
But know this, if you post thrice every day
I will let you kill someone during night!

It's so fun making people do impossible tasks before they can be useful.

[xyzzy]

But Shakespeare didn't rhyme. He punned a lot, but he never rhymed.

[xyzzy]

You are

God.

You can do anything: multiple votes, kill, doc, cop (you pick the sanity), etc. anytime you want, day or night, multiple times per day, you can PM anyone, anytime, you can't die, you've already won. Enjoy.

[xyzzy]

This is a role I'm using soon:

Bom in yor caek

OMG! There's a bomb in your cake! It'll blow up if you target a particular role, so watch out. But I'm feeling mean, so you don't get to find out what your role's effect is. You must send me a target every day. You win if you're among the townies to be last alive, or if 12 other townsfolk win.

It's in a role with a cult. If they're in the cult, they die. If they're not in the cult, nothing happens.

[xyzzy]

Vig: if you target mafia, you die, if you target townies, you die, if you don't target anyone, you get modkilled. You are a survivor. have fun!!

Actually, I had a similar role in a game:

Morals Ninja

Ninjas don't fight for honor and justice. They fight to whack people's heads off. But you like head-whacking

and

justice. You can kill someone every night, but if you accidently kill a townie, you'll commit seppuku.

[xyzzy]

So the best strategy is to claim that you have to send in your votes by PM to the mod.

[xyzzy]

JesterBomb:

You must get lynched to win, if you get lynched, the last 3 people to vote for you get blown up.

This would be fun in a large game.

[xyzzy]

In a game in another forum, I'm doing a bunch of roles which no one there will completely understand: Fritzler, who thinks he can do anything but actually messes everything up, Glrok, who's imitating Fritzler and actually can do anything, Glork, who's trying to kill Glrok (who he believes to be a Glork impersonator), and a random Lyncher who's trying to kill Glork.

Of course, most of the players there have never even heard of Mafiascum, so they'll be so confused they'll Google all the names and end up here. Then we'll finally have them in our grasp.

And they'll lose every time. They're sheep, following around whatever woll in sheep's clothing who's the loudest. It'll be funny. I will laugh. But then they'll become better, and my entertainment will be over.

[xyzzy]

Faith Cop

Like a regular cop, but results only have a 50% chance of being accurate.

[xyzzy]

Town self-voter

You must always be voting for yourself. If at any time you change your vote, you will be modkilled.

Deja Vu

(for a night-start game)

You may only vote for dead players. If people question your votes, you must pretend to have no idea what they're talking about.

Insane Mathematician

When you make a post whose number is a triangular number (of the form (n^2+n)/2), you must pretend to have an absolutely atrocious posting requirement and complain loudly about it. In all other posts you must pretend that you have no posting requirement.

Fingerless Guy

You may not FoS anyone.

[xyzzy]

Flavorless player

You will win if you never let on to the idea that you're playing a game - namely, that you never use any flavor like "cop", "scum", "townie", "nightkill", or anything that suggests that you are not part of a completely abstract strategy contest to determine who is best at lying or catching liars.

[xyzzy]

You are the UnNKable Ascetic Scum Cop Role Cop Doc Vig Tracker Watcher MUP Cannibal.

Every night you may target someone. You will find out their alignment. you will find out their role. You will find out who they target. You will find out who targets them. You will either kill, investigate, doc, or nothing on them. You will kill them. You will protect them from kills. You will kill them and take their powers. You when with the scum. They are: [...]

Mod Note: Also a self-roleblocker

Tracker Tracker

Every night you will find out who the tracker tracks.

[xyzzy]

Eric Bauman

You are Eric Bauman, internet thief extraordinaire. Every night you have a choice of two actions: you can steal someone's role for the night and target someone with it, or you can kill one of those weaker, pathetic artists. (You hate them!) Unfortunately, everyone will be informed of who you targeted and what you targeted them with, because of that watermark you leave everywhere. You win when you are the only living player.

[xyzzy]

You are

Abraham Lincoln.

John Wilkes Booth was wrong: you didn't die. That was an imposter. It was all a setup. You're actually better known as Matthew Ryan, a rogue scientist/time traveler. In your original world, slavery was never abolished, and China now controls slave trade in the US. Twelve years ago they began development on a high-powered weapon that only destroys organic material. Eleven years ago, you boarded a space station controlled by Korea, who in an odd twist of fate is one of the few powerful nations to oppose slavery, and as a result one of the most peaceful places to live. After China began using their super-weapon, Korea quickly developed a special shield to protect the space station. As a result, ten years ago, Korea became the SS Shield, and Earth became China. In a world where the free are predominantly Asian, and one where rampant racism has never quieted, you spent the next two years carefully avoiding all people, while working with a small group of people who lived miles away from you. You eventually managed to get control of the technology that they had built: time travel. Your goal was to reverse the flow of time that led to the world being in the state it's in. You eventually became President in an altered time line. Altered is the key word, though: your old world is still out there, floating along. After you got here, you used your technology to increase your life span exponentially, and you've been carefully watching for signs that the Koreans have found you. They have, now. Some of their own are in your world; but you have one of their bodies, and you can send people back to them. You may send any player from this game to game N+1 every night. However, be warned: your mortal enemy, John Wilkes Booth, is also sending people to your world. Who they'll align with depends on who they were in game N+1, but their alignment might change. You win when the Mafia (the Koreans) in game N (this one) all die, or when John Wilkes Booth dies in game N+1.

[xyzzy]

You are the

animal

. Every night you fall asleep and are unaffected by night kills. You win with the town.

Mod Note: Every night, the animal automatically kills a random person, stated the next day as being someone "mysterious". The townies all have a small statement at the end of their role PMs saying something about watching out for the animal, as well as a randomly chosen name. This randomly chosen name will be the person that dies "randomly", depending on the order of the players. In this case, whoever is player 1 will recieve a name of someone who will die on Night 1, and the last player on the list will have the name of the animal instead. If the animal's target of the night dies or is protected, he'll skip over them and target the next player. Despite this, he is in fact town, but can achieve an independent victory if he's the sole survivor.

I want this role.

[xyzzy]

Xyl, you should mod a large game. And by large, I mean, like, 50 roles.

Chainsaw, anyone? [/ircjoke]

[xyzzy]

You are the

Super Epic Awesome Guy!

You may pick any of the following powers at the beginning of the game: cop, doc, roleblocker, and tracker; you can pick one, or none, or any number of these powers. You will be able to use one power per night. You win when all threats to the town are eliminated.

Mod Note: Each of these powers is held by someone else in the town, and there are no other power roles. By picking one of these powers, that player will become part of an additional scum group where they will have that power, as well as a group kill.

[xyzzy]

Ooh, thought of a fantastic role shortly after entering that.

Preferably for use in something like Verbose, where posts must be of a certain length.

You are

talkative.

You win if the game reaches 100 pages by the time the game ends or you are lynched. You can not be night killed.

[xyzzy]

You are the

idiot.

In your first post you must claim full knowledge of the setup; you must then go on to list 3 power roles and the players who have them and 2 scum + 1 SK, or 3 scum. You win if none of your predictions are correct.

You are the

grammar nazi.

You lose if you make any grammatical errors.

You are the

internet.

You win if any post besides your own contains 20 or more non-quoted grammatical errors.

[xyzzy]

You are

a Madlib

. Choose words or phrases that fit the following, and I'll send you a new role based on your selections.
(1) Sneakers
(2) Lunchtime
(3) Lipitor
(4) Instigate
(5) Cheeseburger
(6) Dance around them
(7) Pretty
(8) Copulate
(9) Dance
(10) Pants

You are

a sneakers

. Each lunchtime you can choose a Lipitor to instigate. If your choice is a cheeseburger you will dace with them. However, if it is pretty, you will copulate instead. You dance with the pants..

[xyzzy]

You are the

Jester!

Mod note: actually a survivor

[xyzzy]

How about a less lying version?

You are a jester or a survivor. You do not know which.

Best.

Role.

Ever.

<3

[xyzzy]

You

don't get a role for this game.

Good luck!

[xyzzy]

You are

Newbie Scum

.

Your first post must be something along the lines of "I'm sorry, I need to be replaced,", and you'll be replaced by <username>, who will have joined the day before the game begins. You will continue playing with <username>, with the password <password>. You may not tell anyone about this. You win if you are lynched day one.

[xyzzy]

You are

a frightened deer

. You may not post if anyone is voting for you. You win if you survive.

[xyzzy]

You are a

bad pun.

...I don't get it either, it's okay.

[xyzzy]

Doesn't it just have to be raised 75%?


You are

Unbuntu

. You rock face... but you are incapable of installing my drivers for my new comp because you have no program that runs .exe files. Therefore, you automatically lose the game because you can't connect to the internet or do anything useful.

sudo apt-get install wine

[xyzzy]

These are some roles I sent to Guardian before iPick began. I was hoping I or someone else would get one of them, but that didn't happen. Now I'm posting them here, because iPick is over.

Xyzzy's role

Congratulations, Xyzzy! You're

Eric Wu

, of emotioneric.com. Each of your posts must contain no less than two emoticons, and at least once per day you must post in all caps. If you fail to use emoticons, you'll lose your vote for the rest of the day, though it will still be displayed; only the actual lynches will possibly change. If you fail to have an all-caps post any day, you'll be listed the next day as "commiting suicide due to pent-up anger." At any time, you may say, " I QUIT! YOU GUYS ARE STUPID!!!!!!! " and you will immediately be "treestumped" - that is, you'll become an unkillable, unlynchable player who can't vote who is confirmed town and can continue posting. You may also at any time say "I just HATE you, <playername>, why don't you just die? You're so retarded.", and <playername> will die. This is a one-use action.

Xyzzy's role

Congratulations! You are

Peyton Farquhar

, of Ambroce Bierce's "An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge". The thing is, you're pretty good at avoiding death - in your head. Any time you die, an Alternate Universe where you lived will be made, Farquharwith a new thread. All roles and other information will be exactly the same, and you will be alive. But there is a drawback - if you die more than two times, you'll finally come back to your senses and actually die - along with every other protown player. Of course, you're not allowed to claim that information, and if you die, the players will be informed that you are an SK Hydra. You win when all threats to the town are dead.

Xyzzy's role

Congratulations! You are

Adlai Stevenson

, long-dead Illinois governor, twice-failed candidate for Presidency, and... Gogo?!?

That's right - you're the mimic from Final Fantasy VI, supposedly rumored by some to be Daryll, some sort of monster from Final Fantasy V, and a previous thief-leader of a... oh, never mind, it doesn't matter, because YOU KNOW THE TRUTH! After all, consider these quotes by yourself: "I suppose I could wear a hat, but them my teeth would fall out to spite me. I could get false ones, but doubtless then I would get fat just to prove my teeth work. The easiest course is to drape my whole body in robes and shawls and hope no one recognizes my eyes," (this perfectly describes your physical appearance as Gogo) "President Eisenhower continues to amaze me. He appears to be an ungainly and graceless man, but when [senator Robert] Taft makes a move, no matter how ridiculous, Eisenhower copies it with the skill of [French mime] Marcel Merceau. I haven't achieved such levels of mimicry with my own party, but I'm working on it," (You are a mimic in Final Fantasy VI) "The legislature is a frightening thing. To this day the state capitol building seems to me a beast ready to swallow me up; the very walls and ceilings seem to crush you as you walk through it," (You were discovered in the belly of a Zone Eater in Final Fantasy VI) "Today we are plunged into a battle that is familiar to us. the enemies and the problems are the same. But the terrain is different. The world around us has changed and shifted so much we no longer recognize it," (You were found after Kefka shifted the world by taking control of the Espers, turning the World of Balance into the World of Ruin).

Now, since you're both a governor of Illinois and a mimic from Final Fantasy VI, you take your abilities from both experiences. During the day, if someone is lynched, you may stop their lynch by PMing me during Twilight (I will give you 24 hours before posting the lynch scene). You may only do this once per player. Also, each night you may mimic the last night action done by someone, in chronological order of when the PM was sent. I will tell you how many, if any, targets you must send. You win when all threats to the town are dead.

Xyzzy's role

Congratulations! You are

Jack Bauer

, and pretty much the most awesome dude ever. ...However, you kind of have some issues in your social life, such as the fact that basically everyone you've ever had a close relationship with is now dead, and the whole torturing terrorists thing. Did I mention you once had a heroin addiction? Okay, so yeah, you're a pretty cool guy on the surface, but you're simply destructive. Every night you can investigate someone AND kill someone, but a random protown player will die if you do either of these things. You are also able to survive practically everything, so you can't be nightkilled, and you can't be lynched. Oh, and you don't win in endgame situations, since even if the President/people of America/yourself are all safe, it's still kind of teh suckzors if your wife/girlfriend/other girlfriend from Mexico/boss/coworker/etc. dies. You win if all threats to the town are destroyed.

Xyzzy's role

You are

Thok, circa 2010

. After being appointed by mith for another term as Title Fairy, you've begun to feel unsure of whether you're doing what's best for Mafiascum. After all, after Jathan, Shea, and JDodge left between '07 and '09, people decided that you (and others) had entirely too much authority. After dozens of users left to form a more open-ended site, you decided to step back and give the people what they wanted from the Title Fairy. However, it did nothing, and you're now unsure of what your next move should be. You may give one player a word they must use in every post or be modkilled each night. You are immune to modkills. You may say, "I think it's time I step down and leave for a while," at any time and you will become a treestump. You win with the town.

Xyzzy's Role

Congratulations! You are

Xyzzy

, a member of the Mafiascum community perhaps best known for games that add no real value to the community. But that's okay, because in the months leading up to spring of 2008 you participated in a sweet-action game modded by Guardian, called iPick. Here's the thing, though - you had a role rigged so you couldn't win. But you tried! And it's possible you succeeded - I can't say I remember. But the important thing is, you had the most power in the game, despite having no truly correct way to use it.

You see, the gimmick behind iPick was that the moderator, Guardian, would come up with roles for each player that would be funny and slightly unbalanced. Your role in iPick was

not

one of these such roles - in fact, it was one of several you wrote yourself, chosen as better than such roles as Emotion Eric and Peyton Farquhar, and even Thok. You yourself wrote in the role PM that you thought it was the best in the role, and it was the last you submitted. The thing is, because your roles were so funny and fantastic, you had the power to alter reality with these roles - you could alter the reality of the role you received. So to honor that, you made a role that could alter the flow of the game substantially, while still making it a race to see if you could force a win on yourself.

Your role stated that you could alter the game at any time in any way, as long as no living players died, and no other players entered the game. It stated that you could change rules, or give other players posting requirements, or even giving or taking away role powers from other players. There was just one hitch to all this power - you lacked a win condition, and you couldn't give yourself one. You were unable to win, and you weren't allowed to, say, put a "Xyzzy wins" rule in the game. You had tremendous power, but you were unable to use it to save yourself.

Or were you?

[xyzzy]

On the same lines:

You are a

Mason-Traitor

. You may not communicate with your mafia partners (

X

and

Y

), but you win with them, even if you are dead. They do not know who you are. You may communicate at Night with your Mason Partner,

Z

.

You are a

Mason-Cop

. You may communicate at night with your partner,

A

. You win with the town.

Mod note 1: Masons are siblings and if one dies, so will the other one.
Mod note 2: Masons are bombs exploding on any night action targeting them.

I imagine the traitor outing the cop at a key moment or in twilight to try and secure the win- next thing you know 3+ people blow up!

Actually, the following would be a very interesting combination of roles:

You are a

mason cop suicide bomber.

You may privately communicate with [~~~~] at night. [~~~~] might be scum. [~~~~] doesn't know your role... or the fact that you may suicide bomb them at any time. You may not inspect your mason partner. You win with the town.

Mod note: sane

You are a

mason cop suicide bomber.

You may privately communicate with [~~~~] at night. [~~~~] might be scum. [~~~~] doesn't know your role... or the fact that you may suicide bomb them at any time. You may not inspect your mason partner. You win with the town.

Mod note: insane

[xyzzy]

Heh, that's actually a pretty nifty role, if not slightly evil to the town.

"What?!? We lost because we kept quoting his crap logic to explain why it was so wrong?!?"

[xyzzy]

The role is much better if he wins alone - otherwise, most towns will be willing to quote him a bunch of times to share the win. Of course, if he wins alone and doesn't mention that part... ^.^

[xyzzy]

You are

not good at getting rid of your enemies.

You and your buddies [~~~~] and [~~~~] can kill n people on the nth night, so you get one kill on night 1, 2 on night 2, etc. However, everyone you kill will come back the morning after next. You win when all protown players are dead.

[xyzzy]

You are

here

.

Every post you make must indicate where you are posting from. You may make only one post per location/computer (no just taking a laptop around the house. I'll be checking IP addresses)

You win with the town. You may win independently if you post from all seven continents.

/in

[xyzzy]

role

You are the

mod's favorite

. You win when... well, actually, you just win. Good job.

[xyzzy]

That's a good role. It would be very interesting in a no-reveal game.

[xyzzy]

You are

quiet.

You can only post once. Ever. But you are a quadruple voter, and your multiple votes can cause multiple lynches.

You win with the town.

This would be very interesting in a game with daytalk.

[xyzzy]

bulletproof vengeful compulsive visitor supersaint

[xyzzy]

Non-bulletproof townie

if you get nightkilled, you die.