LSG Character Poll 2018 (FINISHED)

[Malkon05]

Imagine if it's rigged and his characters are the top slots.

Jk of course, but I'm excited to see what I missed during my hiatus and rebranding.

#onlyonecharacter

[Malkon05]

Goooooood afternoon class. Today we have a beary exciiiiiting announcement to make. I am happy to announce that we are beginning a beary special game. We are going to review the Monokuma files of the deceased students thus far to find out who our 16 classmates will be that will participate in our special Killing Game, Puhuhu!




As the audience, you’ve had the extra special task of helping select who the contestants are this game. As such, you’ve helped eliminate over 85 people personally. Exciting, practically makes me…moist…mmmmmm.



I’ve been asked to host today’s Killing Game to see if any of our contestants have what it takes to actually graduate, which they will do if they can successfully get away with killing another contestant without getting caught…buuuuuut I’m getting ahead of myself. We have a total of 108 contestants that you’ve had weeks to vote on and as such you have decided the 16 contestants worthy of playing and being part of the MS Class! MMMMM sooo deliccioussss slurp slurp!



Let’s get to the despair now, shall we? Bear in mind, this is all going to come as a bit of a shock. Some of you may see that your choices weren’t exactly the ones others wanted. I can’t waaaaait to see your faces so full of despair as that happens as we reveal the contestants you have directly or indirectly had a hand in helping kill, puhuhuhu! Without further ado, I present the first Monokuma file…of people you decided weren’t worthy of living.



Such a naughty audience you are:

#108. Junko Enoshima

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

1.389/10

Game Ranking:

27/27

=#106. Himiko Yumeno

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

2.000/10

Game Ranking:

26/27

=#106. Matthew Van Melikian

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

2.000/10

Game Ranking:

22/22

#105. Minseo

The Genius

Average:

2.231/10

Game Ranking:

15/15

=#103. Yohwan

The Genius

Average:

2.615/10

Game Ranking:

14/15

=#103. Yoonsun

The Genius

Average:

2.615/10

Game Ranking:

13/15

#102. Kyungran

The Genius

Average:

2.692/10

Game Ranking:

12/15

#101. Samus

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

2.786/10

Game Ranking:

16/16

#100. Angie Yonaga

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

2.813/10

Game Ranking:

25/27

#99. Bentley Williams

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

2.909/10

Game Ranking:

16/16

#98. Sanjaya Malakar

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

3.182/10

Game Ranking:

15/16

#97. Kokichi Oma

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

3.294/10

Game Ranking:

24/27

[Malkon05]

Monokuma File #3 was full of people from Reverse the Curse. Not a lot of love for the cast of repeat characters puhuhu~ Can the remaining players carry the season? Or will they just go into hibernation forever this time?

This next group is bearry special...not! Psych, puhuh! I fooled you all. Just another set of people you deemed unworthy of being in your top 16. You are such a ruuuuthless audience. Bahahahah! It fills me with such delicious despair.



Did somebody say Despair? <3



Oh god, not this annoying harlot.



You know what I find really full of despair? Kandy. It’s delicious like the taste of tears of the adults I helped kill to get here. Does anyone have any-



NO MONACA NOBODY HAS ANY KANDY FOR YOU SCRAM!!!




Monokuma’s so meaaaaan *sniffles* why are you so mean?



Because nobody likes you and your godawful kandy shit that no one even understands. Where the hell was kandy mentioned anywhere in our franchise!?



I just *sniffles* thought it would be a fun way to be myself in a game.



WELL IT WASN’T NOW BEAT IT TWOT!



D-did you just call me a twot? *evil smile* time for bear to die.



H-huh?



Good night.



Now that we’ve gotten rid of Monokuma for good, I’m Monaca, and I’ll be hosting the remainder of this. Let’s get back to killing adults now okayyyyyyy? <3

#76. Tinkles

Rick & Morty Big Brother

Average:

4.769/10

Game Ranking:

9/12

#75. Korekiyo

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

4.789/10

Game Ranking:

19/27

#74. Chris Zegers

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

4.909/10

Game Ranking:

11/16

#73. Dave Strider

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

4.938/10

Game Ranking:

15/22

#72. Paul Abrahamian

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

5.000/10

Game Ranking:

10/16

#71. Ness

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

5.053/10

Game Ranking:

13/16

#70. Luigi

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

5.059/10

Game Ranking:

12/16

#69. Courtney Act

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

5.154/10

Game Ranking:

9/16

#68. Dongmin

The Genius

Average:

5.167/10

Game Ranking:

9/15

#67. Ike

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

5.188/10

Game Ranking:

11/16

[Malkon05]

Monokuma File #4...more like Monacuma File #4 amiright? <3 xoxo



It appears a few Expect the Expected & Super Smash Bros members went bye bye this time. So long adults! *waves* Anyways, I’m actually looking for a few recruits for the Warriors of Hope, are any of you audience members interest-



I-is this blood? Oh...oh no...what about my plans to go to space and...be...a...NEET...ugh…



BAHAHAHA I’m baaaaaaack everyone! Didja miss me? Guess this time I got to...find the body. You know what that means.

*DING DONG PING PONG*



Now that we’ve gotten that hobag Monaca out of here. Let’s get back to the real stuff you came here for. TIME TO REVEAL THE NEXT PEOPLE YOU KILLED!!!

#66. Fox

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

5.222/10

Game Ranking:

10/16

#65. Mr. Meeseeks

Rick & Morty Big Brother

Average:

5.333/10

Game Ranking:

8/12

#64. Leon Kuwata

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

5.389/10

Game Ranking:

18/27

#63. Sonia Nevermind

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

5.438/10

Game Ranking:

17/27

#62. Mario

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

5.467/10

Game Ranking:

9/16

#61. Penny Proud

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

5.471/10

Game Ranking:

14/22

#60. JT Thomas

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

5.500/10

Game Ranking:

8/16

=#58. Tyrael

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

5.556/10

Game Ranking:

13/22

=#58. Peach

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

5.556/10

Game Ranking:

8/16

=#56. Sunggyu

The Genius

Average:

5.583/10

Game Ranking:

=7/15

=#56. Hongchul

The Genius

Average:

5.583/10

Game Ranking:

=7/15

[Malkon05]

just realized

matthew from rtc is 2 22/22, got voted out 2 times, and the charactee is on this list 2 times

Even at my worst, I'm a fucking lege lmao

This reminds me of the Christmas Story lamp.

[Malkon05]

Monokuma File #8 was full of RTC deaths and the loss of our first former winner. AHAHA beautiful!



I’m going to go take a quick break to prep our top 16, but while I do that, let’s have another…



Have you ever really looked at your hands?



But no, seriously, have you? Really stared at the hairs, the bones, right down to where little tiny molecules are bouncing around all over you, at work in the random business of life?

They're covered in skin. What good is that stuff? It's gross, it's alive, there are thousands of tiny critters living in and on you. It's much nicer to be made of something inhospitable and useless for eating. That way, nothing will try to eat you! It's a good idea to build in some rocket launchers just in case, though. A nice plush exterior is the way of the future. Eventually humans will think too hard about skin, and carbon, and inner goop, and you'll all come crying to me to hook you up at Build-a-Bear. Well, get your own contacts! What have you done for me lately, huh? Why don't you buy me flowers anymore? It's like you don't even care.



It's always hot and cold with you. I need someone more consistent.



And while you were distracted by my un-bear-ably delectable good looks, I think its time for…

#26. Mr. Goldenfold

Rick & Morty Big Brother

Average:

6.846/10

Game Ranking:

5/12

#25. Gundham Tanaka

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

6.850/10

Game Ranking:

8/27

#24. Kirby

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

6.889/10

Game Ranking:

4/16

#23. Tulsi Gabbard

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

6.895/10

Game Ranking:

3/22

#22. Jinho

The Genius

Average:

6.917/10

Game Ranking:

3/15

#21. Poison Ivy

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

6.933/10

Game Ranking:

2/22

#20. Chihiro

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

7.056/10

Game Ranking:

7/27

#19. Matthew Van Melikian

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

7.077/10

Game Ranking:

3/16

#18. Shuichi Saihara

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

7.200/10

Game Ranking:

6/27

#17. Big-Boobed Waitress

Rick & Morty Big Brother

Average:

7.231/10

Game Ranking:

4/12

[Malkon05]

Bears and shebears. It has been quite a tantalizing journey thus far. The audience has killed over 80 poor unfortunate souls. And now our final 16 contestants are brutally killing one anotherrrrr! It’s quite infectious.



I don’t want to keep you too long from everything, but I do want to take time to acknowledge our other sponsor, ball in a cup.



Thank you ball in a cup. It’s a ball in a cup that is on a string and attached to a cup. So if you accidentally drop the ball from the cup, it’s okay because the string attached to the cup will catch the ball that can just be caught in the cup.

Meanwhile, while I distracted you with ball in a cup, things happened and editing is done, so uhhhhhh yeah take a look!

#10. Doohee

The Genius

Average:

7.615/10

Game Ranking:

2/15

#9. Jimmy Cha

The Genius

Average:

7.692/10

Game Ranking:

1/15

#8. Celestia Ludenberg

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

7.700/10

Game Ranking:

3/27

#7. Donkey Kong

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

7.944/10

Game Ranking:

2/16

#6. Yasuhiro Hagakure

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

8.050/10

Game Ranking:

2/27

#5. Abradolf Lincler

Rick & Morty Big Brother

Average:

8.143/10

Game Ranking:

1/12

#4. Jared Goldman

Survivor: Expect the Expected

Average:

8.200/10

Game Ranking:

1/16


















During Class Trial 4, It was revealed that Celestia used Jimmy Cha to kill Doohee and then killed Jimmy Cha herself. This trial was a bit of a doozhee, puhuhu, as the remaining classmates thought only one person killed Doohee, which was imposserous. Eventually, evidence came to light that Jimmy Cha killed Doohee, but was persuaded by someone to do it. With a last minute slip of the tongue, the ever charming Celestia accidentally implicated herself as the killer, and the evidence fit.



During Class Trial 5, it was revealed that Yasuhiro killed donkey kong. The motive? Because Donkey Kong tried to say his hair was better…and so Yasu did it…in front of everyone…it wasn’t much of a class trial tbh.



During Class Trial 6, it was revealed that former winner Jared Goldman killed Abradolf Lincler in the same fashion that he killed the person who helped him graduate in his prior game. He got Lincler to trust him and then decided it was a better move not to go against him because the comics that Lincler posted would have greatly and hugely won the end. Threatened by the epicness of Lincler, Jared caught him off guard, and killed him with long winded speech words. Lincler, unable to keep up with the drawings of Jared’s awesomeness & bossness, died from awesome overload. Jared almost got away with it, but a single stray page of Lincler’s amazing scrapbook of awesome falled out of his pocket just as they were about to vote, and just like his game, he got all but one vote and was thusly eliminated.



So much despair, so much killing, so many bitter audience members. I’m suuuuure you are all bearly containing yourself with hate. You can’t stand that the characters you love placed so low and died. Puhuhu~



We are down to our last three contestants: Akane representing Killing School Semester, Jigglypuff representing Super Smash Brothers, and Katie Gallagher from Reverse the Curse. Will these three graduate or fall to complete desbear?



The thrilling conclusion to this story will be coming to you in the near future. Make sure you don’t hibernate! I promise, it’s an ending you don’t want to miss ahahah!

[Malkon05]

As the trial finished, the three remaining contestants watched in horror as Jared Goldman was the next to be executed. Then they looked around, only 3 remained. Akane, Jigglypuff, and Katie Gallagher were the last ones left.

“What are we going to do? We can’t exactly graduate. If one of us kills the other, then it’s a stalemate.”



“I dunno binch cummies all around slurrrrrp!”



“God you are so gross with that, we should just kill Monokuma and fuck it uuuup!!!!!”



“Oh, what’s this? Is it my husband Ryan Gosling, that cheating bastard?”



Jigglypuff picked up a slip of paper that had fallen out of Jared’s pocket. She looked at it, and showed it to the others.

“Oh my god! This is rigged. There’s no way…”




They could only stare as they were looking at the last monokuma file

#3. Host Ghost Jeff Probst

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

10/10

Game Ranking:

1/23

#2. Monaca Towa

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

69.420/10

Game Ranking:

2/28

#1. Junko Enoshima

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

INTEGER_OVERFLOW_ERROR

/10

Game Ranking:

1/28









“But, we’re the top 3! That really fuckin makes me angry aggghhhhhh! This is obviously a fake.”



“This means, that...Junko’s still alive?”



All three turned around to look at Monokuma.

“That’s right bitches.”

There’s smoke that fills the stadium as a shadoweh figure appears from out of nowhere.

“It’s me! The queen of despair, Junko Enoshima, and I truly am the best character of all time! BWHAHAHA!”



The three remaining finalists gasp and much shock ensues.

“You are a goddam traitor gimme my crown!”



Junko just laughs as Katie tries to swipe it from her.

“The three of you can’t graduate and thus I win, despair for everyone.”



“But that’s not fair, why would we not be the top three unless…” Jigglypuff ponders and then looks at Junko. “Unless, you actually did murder someone!”



Junko snorts. “Riiiiiight because that would be so smaaaart of me to do.”



"Imbeciles, I will teach you to mess with the likes of me! YOU POOR UNFORTUNATE SOULS!”



Suddenly, out of nowhere, Junko picks up the Trident from the LIttle Mermaid and becomes Super Mega Junko.



"AHAHAHA I WILL CRUSH YOU ALL YOU INGRATES."



"Stop!"



The three contestants who were just about to give into despair turn to the voice and smile.

“Monomi!” They all cheer in unison.

“I have come back by the power of love that the audience has shown for all 108 characters that have valiantly played this poll. You all have given me the power to defeat Junko once and for all!”



"I’ll crush you you stupid pink harlot! GWAHHHHH!"



"Not if I can help it!"



But in the end, Monomi’s love & power only sustained through the battle, at the end she fell to her death.

After a few minutes of mourning, Akane tapped her chin. “We still aren’t fucking getting out of here unless we graduate.”



“Thaaaat’s right puhuhu~”

“Monokuma!” The three exclaimed as they turned to see the bear.

“You have defeated the imposter winner, but this game still ends in a draw since none of you can kill without being immediately discovered. Bahaha!”



“But wait guis, ive got a idea”



Akane and Jiggly both blink and look at Katie who holds out the file that showed the placements with Ghost Probst, Monaca, & Junko on it.

“Its easy binches. U just got to look at dis slurp slurp ahah.”



They blink and then their eyes light up as all three look at Monokuma.

“Time for the final showdown you punk bear!”



“We will do this for everyone you have killed!”



“Ahah dat elizabinch gonna wish shed never crossed me!”

for real this time

#3. Jigglypuff

Super Survivor Bros

Average:

8.235/10

Game Ranking:

1/16

#2. Akane Owari

Survivor: Killing School Semester

Average:

8.389/10

Game Ranking:

1/27

#1. Katie Gallagher

Survivor: Reverse the Curse

Average:

8.750/10

Game Ranking:

1/22






















After a crazy battle, the final trial ended as our final 3 correctly deduced that Sayaka was not actually Nagito’s killer from Class Trial 1. DUH DUH DUHHHH!!!!!

Turns out it was Malkon & CaptainMeme all along. They convinced Nagito that there was a hidden idol in the sewers and being the item hungry player that he was, Nagito went in willingly, where IT the clown did the deed. Then all they had to do was frame Sayaka and convince her she did it…which…all things considered wasn’t difficult.



The MVP was Katie Gallagher, whose wacky antics and retelling of the crazy theory using pictures of PMs, lots of slurps n cummies, & funeral pyres somehow actually ended up being what happened. To everyone’s shock she correctly then identified the hidden players and outed them.



After figuring it out, a door opens, and the final three leave knowing in a way, they have avenged their fallen comrades and have overcome complete despair in order to live the rest of their lives.

So I guess…in the end, it is we who will face despair. Congratulations to the Graduating Class of 2018. So long MSers…and enjoy the final show.

[Malkon05]

That was a work of goddamn art. Excellent flavour you guys, loved it <3

QUEEN KATIE

*just got crushed by giant crushing mechanism, will respond after alive again*