Spoil a Wish II

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You feel a little regret not asking for a partner within the

animalia

kingdom, and you're not quite sure what species of fungi she is.

I wish to be the next contestant on american gameshow The Price is Right.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. 4 exact clones of Not_Mafia join for the sole purpose of trolling the shit out of your game.

I wish for a boyfriend.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You now have a cat's tounge and flexibility, and an insatiable urge to groom yourself.

I wish that twittter would finally burn to the ground and a new, better, healthier website grew from its' ashes.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted.

I wish I didn't need to work so damn hard to meet my basic needs.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You come to realize, to your dismay, that the best parts of your teenage years weren't really that great, leaving you with a lurking feeling of dysphoria that never really fades away.

I wish for an hourglass constructed with enriched uranium dust and leaden materials.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. Instead of breaking, appliances run more and more slowly as time goes on, completely ruining your cup of coffee in the morning.

I wish it was time to play american gameshow Wheel of Fortune.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. They drive him into manslaughter instead.

I wish you a merry christmas.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. With no alterations or additions, you unceremoniously throw it out onto the internet as a "finished" work.

I wish for Jupiter to suddenly and inexplicably condense into a star.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. As previously mentioned, all life on Earth has recently ended, making for a rather lonesome and chilling experience.

I wish for a slice of pizza.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. Much like transformers, you have the ability to transform into a panther fur upholstered motorbike.

I wish there was a Mish Mash thread for all sorts of improv games.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. The dishes run several advertising campaigns which greenwash the environmental impacts of disposable dishware.

I wish that everyone who is unfathomably wealthy would become fathomably wealthy.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. While they might realize just how out of touch their beliefs are with reality, they use this as further evidence that reality is wrong, bolstering their beliefs more.

I wish for some fish.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. With the world not being unbearably hateful, negative terms to refer to someone are eliminated completely. There no longer exists words to describe your skill at chess.

I wish for less fish.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. These supposedly "new" dining room furnishings smell strongly of fish.

I wish for the portal gun

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. A team of mice coat and cover the smell of fish with the smell of various cheeses.

I wish for a box containing money disguised as inconspicious gold bars

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. The optics of having nothing bad happen to you becomes much more appealing to bad people, causing those that have power and influence over the media to bend it to their will, fooling the masses into believing that they must be righteous as nothing bad hath fallen onto them.

I wish the cake wasn't a lie :(

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. It'll still be spoiled just the same.

I wish that more flags would use a purple/green color combination.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You grow new and exotic body parts for your cat to play with. You still get scratched up just the same.

I wish squids are real.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You, specifically, have a good life, at the expense of everyone else. You remain oblivious of this fact, to remain feeling happy and satisfied.

I wish to be literally perfect.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You become incapable of playing chess.

I wish Thomas Midgley Jr. wasn't all that interested in chemistry and/or making money

[Jake The Wolfie]

We are unable to fulfill this wish at this time due to the wish being corrupted in memory. We apologize for this inconvinience.

I wish for more green circuits (I keep running out of them because blue circuits keep eating them, the bastards.)

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. Due to the aforementioned total destruction of my oil refineries by those biters those bastards, the experiments are lengthened due to multiple critical lacks of materials including explosives, plastics, and batteries. The projected timeline of the experiments are lengthened by decades, giving vonflare multiple years to recover after each test.

I wish that there were more bunnies per square mile.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. We ramp up the pollution production, choking out many millions of bunnies (and annoying the biters.)

I wish that I could just build the damn rocket already

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted, you now have something much worse, the inability to see your work as anything other than a bunch of crappy patchwork poorly masquerading as a story.

I wish I had

more

green circuits. Modules are eating all of my circuits god damnit!

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. It'll be sad to see you leave the red shores of MafiaScum, but sometimes we must say goodbye to the calm waters of home to explore the deep blue rapids of-
Man, you look awful. The sea didn't treat you that well, did it?

I wish that it were revealed to me that my life was merely an analogy for Plato's Cave, and that I saw reality for what it really was.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. She loves the outside of it a hell of a lot better than any other part.

I wish for the bees.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You transform into an anthropomorphic cougar, but without the opposable thumbs, or the coding skills.

I wish that it were possible to observe the universe at different timescales.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. It tastes.. fleshlike. While you can't confirm that it isn't a certain MS user, you also can't rule it out.

I wish that you would stop twisting my words, damnit!

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You were the one who they teleported bread to for 3 days.

I wish for a scarf made of a radioactive nucleotide of gold

[Jake The Wolfie]

Okay Mr. Coug.

Gimmie some fish.

[Jake The Wolfie]

*nom nom nom*
Ooo, Fugi! How did you know it's poison was my favorite!! It's like what wasabi is to hot sauce, very spicy.

I wiah for more of this fish, immediately!

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You learn that, no, in fact, there exist no answers to your identity crisis.

I wish for your best artistic depiction of spiderman.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. Such a tragedy then, to find that he does not feel the same for you.

I wish for a Brand. Neeww. Caaaaarrr!!

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. You are able to perfectly flambé any substance. This goes terribly wrong after you decide to flambé an explosive substance by misteak.

I wish to let people know that I will never post in any necroposting game that I haven't already posted in.

[Jake The Wolfie]

Granted. Your choices are The Matrix, Inception, or TeneT. This will likely be the longest 24 hours you'll ever experience with nothing to show for it.

I wish for "some rope"