Snake Oil: First Sale in progress

[imaginality]

This is based on the Snake Oil party game. Whoever can best pitch their unlikely Items to an eclectic mix of Customers will be crowned the best Snake Oil Seller!

A note on the rules: I've adapted the rules for forum play. I think these rules will make for a good forum version of the game, but I'm happy to tweak them before game start by popular request.

the rules

Game Setup

• Sign up in this thread or via PM
  
• The game will begin in
  (expired on 2024-05-02 19:30:00)
  
  
• Additional players can still join after the game has started
  
• There is no maximum number of players
  
  
• Players start the game with six Word cards each
  
  Example: Fountain, Custard, Beard, Power, Fashion, Pizza

Advertising

• The Advertising phase begins when I reveal the Customer card
  
  Example: Hitchhiker
  
  
  
• Players use exactly two of their Word cards to make an Item, and pitch it to the Customer
  
  Example: "As a hitchhiker, you need drivers to slow down so they read your sign. That's where a Custard Blanket can help! Spread your Custard Blanket across the highway and drivers won't dare speed past you."
  
  
  
• Adverts must be a single post of 100 words or fewer
  
• No other posts are permitted during the Advertising phase.
  
• Players may advertise in any order
  
  
• The Advertising phase ends when I post to say it has - which will be soon after all players have advertised, or after 48 hours, whichever comes first

Ordering

• Players may post in the game thread during the Ordering phase, to:
  - comment on or ask questions about other Items, and/or
  ‐ respond to direct questions or comments about the player's own Item [no unsolicited pitches, just responding to Customer queries/feedback]
  
• Spectators may also post in the game thread during the Ordering phase
  
  
• Players must order whichever Item they think the Customer would want. Whether that's the most useful, the most fun, or simply the best pitched... a good snake oil salesperson can sell anything!
  
• Players order by PMing me their choice
  
• Players are not allowed to order their own Item
  
• Players who do not place an order will be docked a point
  
  
• In their PM, along with their order, players may optionally indicate their preference for how the next Sale begins:
  
  A. Refill hand to six Word cards [this is the default option]
  B. Discard all remaining Word cards and receive a new set of six Word cards
  C. Begin the next Sale with just the remaining Word cards (or draw just two cards, if players have no cards left)
  
  
• The Sale ends after all players have placed their orders, or after 72 hours, whichever comes first

Scoring and Game End

• Each Item ordered earns the player selling the Item one point
  
• After each Sale, I will reveal which Item(s) were the most popular; these Item(s) earn a bonus point
  
  Example: three players ordered Alice's Ferret Telescopes, two players ordered Bob's Helicopter Repellent, no other Items were ordered. Alice scores four points, Bob scores two points; I announce "Alice's Ferret Telescopes were the best-selling Item in Sale One!"
  
  
• I will then PM players new Word cards (or not, depending on which option the winner of the Sale selected) and the next Sale will begin
  
• At the halfway point, I will reveal the current standings
  
• The game ends after six Sales
  
  Special Sales:
  
• In Sale Three, you can include artwork with your pitches
  
• In Sale Six, there will be a 'Double Customer' for players to pitch to
  
  Example: Vampire Astronaut
  
  
  
• The player with the most points at the end of the game wins!
  
• In the case of a tie, the first tie-breaker is the number of Sales won; if still tied, the players' most popular Item(s) are the remaining tie-breaker(s)

Most importantly:

Have fun! Be creative! Enjoy! Play fair!

List of players:
1. biancospino
2. Jake The Wolfie
3. JerryArr
4. Charles510
5. DragonEater70

6.

This could be you!

7.

So could this!

8.

Etc.

9.

You get the idea

10.

Sign up now!

[biancospino]

/confirm

[Jake The Wolfie]

/in as "Jake The Wolfie"

[JerryArr]

/in!

[Charles510]

/in

[imaginality]

With four players signed up, we are good to go! Round 1 will start in

(expired on 2024-05-02 19:30:00)

If you haven't signed up yet, you haven't missed
your chance - further sign-ups are more than welcome!

[imaginality]

The first Sale Period begins now!

You are pitching your products to a

Sports Mascot

.

The Advertising phase begins now and ends when everyone has advertised or in

(expired on 2024-05-04 19:30:00)

[Jake The Wolfie]

Hello. I'm William Afton, CEO of Afton Robotics, LLC. Here at Afton Robotics, we are dedicated to providing you with a wide variety of high-quality, advanced robotic solutions. In accordance with this, we are excited to announce our latest line of TechnoExos; the

Machine Friend

model comes integrated with our latest AiCore technology allowing for both smooth, humanlike motion and synthesized, intelligent speech. While such advanced technology would normally set you back hundreds of thousands of dollars, we will be offering a rent-to-own model starting at just over 3000 dollars each month.

This presentation created by Afton Robotics, LLC

[Charles510]

Ok, looks like I have to read the rules and figure out how to play this game

[biancospino]

Are you tired of your team losing, match after match, despite your fun coreography and your joyful cheers? If your team wants the trophy, your job isn't to cheer for them; but to make the other side lose.

Introducing the

Fear Broom

™.

A novel pom-pom with state-of-the-art programmable bristles, engineered to move in hypnotic patterns that target the neural paths in the amygdala responsible for the activation of fear, leaving the opposing team in a state of deep primal dread; despair hindering their performance; an inexplicable sense of impending doom shadowing their motivation; victory will become a piece of cake!

[Charles510]

Hey there,

Sports Mascot!

Ever find yourself needing that extra edge to pump up the crowd? Introducing the

Lava Suit

! Picture this: you emerge onto the field in a blaze of glory, flames licking at your heels, the crowd roaring with excitement! With the

Lava Suit

, you'll be the hottest mascot in town, literally! Imagine the intimidation factor when you're decked out in flames, rallying the team to victory. Don't blend into the background; stand out with the

Lava Suit

, the ultimate symbol of team spirit and ferocity!

[DragonEater70]

/in for this round

[JerryArr]

Listen, you need to pump the crowd up, but it's hard to see in that costume. That's why you need the

Scream Leash

! Its constant noise-making technology keeps the crowd on their feet for the entire game, and you're safe in your 2 yard diameter circle! No more decisions on which baby to kiss, no more tripping on chairs, no more trouble! Just let the

Scream Leash

do the work for you!

[imaginality]

Well, we have some great products on offer here today, folks - and now it's time to order your favourite!

You have

0 days, 8 hours, 39 minutes

to place your orders by PMing me!

And if you (anyone reading this) have any questions or comments about one of the products, simply post them here and the relevant sales rep will be happy to respond, I'm sure.

[Jake The Wolfie]

For the

Fear Broom

™, is this effect ethical? It seems like things could go very wrong very fast if this products ends up in the wrong hands.

Does the

Lava Suit

have the capacity to set the enviroment, or more importantly the user on fire?

What sound does the

Scream Leash

make? Is it pleasant to the ear?

[JerryArr]

What sound does the

Scream Leash

make? Is it pleasant to the ear?

So, imagine the sound of a sold out crowd screaming and cheering. Now, imagine that sound being made by one person. It's pretty much that! Everyone loves the sound of the roar of a crowd.

[biancospino]

For the

Fear Broom

™, is this effect ethical? It seems like things could go very wrong very fast if this products ends up in the wrong hands.

Our legal team has determined that (by sapient use of loopholes) it does not strictly violate any law on the books in any state, which is basically the same as being ethical. Perhaps some dusty philosophers want you to believe there's more to morality than legality, but they just don't want you to live up to your full potential.
And besides, if you are afraid of this one-of-a-kind marvel falling into the wrong hands, that's even more incentive to assure it falls into yours. You wouldn't want some bad actor taking hold of it, would you?

---

About the

Machine Friend

; I'm afraid it may just steal my mascot's job. If it does everything that I do on the field, what need there will be of me?

Is the

Lava suit

capable of working during rains? And if it is, can it avoid producing huge amounts of smoke?

How can the

Scream Leash

determine what sound is it best for it to produce? A crowd can do many different kind of roars depending on the circumstances

[Charles510]

Is the Lava suit capable of working during rains? And if it is, can it avoid producing huge amounts of smoke?

The

Lava Suit

will produce a plume of steam when worn in the rain!

[Charles510]

Does the Lava Suit have the capacity to set the enviroment, or more importantly the user on fire?

Yes and no. The user is immune to fire damage.

[biancospino]

The

Lava Suit

will produce a plume of steam when worn in the rain!

Isn't the smoke going to obscure the fans' view of the game?

Also, your answer to Jake has been mighty wiggly; the user may be fine (not that it's clear how can thet be, mind) but what about the

environment

? Grass is flammable...

[JerryArr]

How can the

Scream Leash

determine what sound is it best for it to produce? A crowd can do many different kind of roars depending on the circumstances

It doesn't need to. The approving screams and cheers have been scientifically proven to be the best sound; there is no need for another! Makes things much simpler, too!

Now for some questions...

Is the

Machine Friend

designed to replace the work of a mascot?

How good is the

Fear Broom

™ at being a broom?

How is the

Lava Suit

delivered to the mascot once it's purchased?

[biancospino]

How good is the

Fear Broom

™ at being a broom?

Well it

has

bristles, and as such can reasonably be used as a broom, but likely not a good one. Not only it's specifically designed to be wielded as a pom-pom, but also the mechanically moving bristles are likely going to spread the dust around.

Also, excessive amount of dust and/or grime can damage some components; damage caused by usage unaligned with the product's intended purpose voids the product's warranty.

[Jake The Wolfie]

About the

Machine Friend

; I'm afraid it may just steal my mascot's job. If it does everything that I do on the field, what need there will be of me?

Ah, excellent question. While it is fully capable of performing your job exactly as you do it, this leaves you with the capacity to, say, invest in another costume and be a second mascot on the field.
If two mascots isn't to your taste, why not have it assist you off the field? While you're out and about performing as a mascot, you could have your

Machine Friend

washing and de-odourizing your other costumes. Just imagine how much time you could save that way.

Is the

Machine Friend

designed to replace the work of a mascot?

It is fully capable of replacing you on the field, if that is what you program it to do. Much like our previous, much older models (in collaboration with Fazbear Entertainment) they have a full range of movement whether in costume or out.

[imaginality]

Well folks, we're about to enter the final day of this Sale. If you haven't placed your orders yet, make sure to do so, you don't want to miss out on these literally fabulous items!