Elect The Executioner: GG

[PiggyGal15]

/iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin

[PiggyGal15]

Yeah right, you know like it

[PiggyGal15]

3 to Mist

[PiggyGal15]

But what if I want you to execute Mist?

[PiggyGal15]

But what if I want you to execute Mist?

<3 I'm not saying I

do

, I'm just saying what if

[PiggyGal15]

3 to Xofy

[PiggyGal15]

3 to ani

[PiggyGal15]

Piggy knew exactly what she was doing, already prepared for this moment.

Spoiler:

Just kidding, no I'm not. I'll have something ready soon... eventually...

why did you all do this to me?

I'm not ready

[PiggyGal15]

Piggy woke up, still feeling rather sick from the cold she was still getting over. Going on her computer she opened up Skype and responded to all the messages. It was tough being out of commission for a whole day but she got right back in to the swing of things.

Heading over to her favourite websites, Piggy started writing all her beautiful smut again - it was her favourite pastime. However, xofelf and Shadoweh felt the need to constantly bother her, justifying that it was Piggy's birthday and they should have a fun night and all that jazz. Sighing but indulging their cute faces, Piggy spent hours talking to them only to have animorpherv1 start pestering her too. Grr, how dare all these fools keep her from writing her beautiful smut?!

Eventually they all gave her some space to go back to writing when Mist7676 and pablito decided to make her life even more miserable by dumping the responsibility of writing for this game on her. Why was no one letting her just write her smut in peace!?

Getting absolutely fed up with all these distractions, Piggy cut herself off from everything else, happily finishing up everything she wanted to write. This Dirk Strider/Rainbow Dash crossover was her best masterpiece yet! When she was finished, she couldn't help but wonder what life would be like if she lived in an a/b/o universe... It then occurred to her that thinking about writing fics about her friends was sort of crossing the line, and quickly snapped back to reality. Except, she pondered, wasn't she already writing a fanfic about her friends? Geez, things were getting too meta.

Ignoring all the inception, she went back to mafiascum and noticed she had several PMs.

'Who be a messaging me?'

Piggy wondered to herself, opening up her inbox to see it filled with prods, specifically from inspectorscout! UGGGGGGHHHHH!

That was

it!

Piggy had had enough! Felissan had the gall to ask her when she was going to post her death scene and Piggy was

done

. She flipped the ginormous table and everyone watched as it rose high up in the air and came crashing down.

Spoiler: (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

inspectorscout was squashed by the table

[PiggyGal15]

*just realizes she forgot to add D3f3nd3r in her death post*
I'm sorry Will this make it up to you?

3 to d3f

[PiggyGal15]

Ani's already elected, but I'll still switch

3 to ani

anyways

[PiggyGal15]

3 to xof

[PiggyGal15]

A SOTRY CONTINUED
WRITTEN BY NOT SHADOWEHGIGH

PREVIOUSLY ON A SOTRY, THE GIRLIES FOUND A HOUSE WITH THE MASINS! THEY BURNY IT DOWN AND KILLED THE EVIL BOY, D3FF4D3N7DRF3R8.

CONTINUING ON IN OUR GLASEIXU FAR AWAY THERE WERE STILL THREE GIRLS AND THEY WUZ STILL THE BET AT THE SASS.
THE SGHDSFADOWEH ONE WAS THE SASSIEST AND BESTEST,
THE XOFY ONE WAS ALWAYS BUSY AND MADE EVERYONE VERY VERY SAD BECAUSE THEY MISS HER CUTE FACE AND WANT HER TO JOIN THE CALLS MORE OFTEN,
AND FINALLY THERE WAS THE PIGGY ONE AND THOUGH SHE WAS THE SMOLLEST THEY ALL LOVED HER THE BESTEST.

THE BOYS WERE CATCHING WIND OF THE GIRLSIES PLAN AND NOTICED ONLY TWO OF THEM WERE LEFT. HOWEVER, THEY WERE ONCE AGAIN THWARTED BY PUTTING ANOTHER FEMALE IN THE THRONE OF POWER (I mean really guys, did you not see this coming?

Really?

)

PIGGY WAS THE ONE IN CHARGE NOW AND AS LEADER SHE DEMANDED MORE BOY BLOOD. NONE OF THE STINKY, COOTIE RIDDEN MALES WERE ALLOWED TO SURVIVE!! IT WAS UP TO PIGGY TO DECIDE WHICH OF THE TWO SMELLY BOYS SHOULD LOSE THEIR HEAD, AND THOUGH PEOPLE MAY HAVE BEEN CALLING FOR POOR PABLITO'S BLOOD, PIGGY REMEMBERED THAT EVEN IN THE WORST OF TIMES, PABS REMEMBERED THAT THE FANFICS ALWAYS COME FIRST.

ANIMORPH, ON THE OTHER HAND, TRIED TO GO AGAINST THE PIG AND GAVE HIS POINTS TO THE XOFFEE TOFFEE, WHICH DID NOT MAKE THE PIGGY HAPPY AT ALL. THIS WAS HER THRONE, HER TIME TO SHINE, AND THOUGH SHE LOVED HER ELF VERY MUCH, THERE SHOULD BE NO OTHER VOTES THAN HER!

Spoiler: i crie ervyteim

That's when Piggy realized that this writing style is very hard to emulate when you're a Grammar Nazi and 110% sober, so she dropped it and decided to write a normal story like a normal person.

Once upon a normal time, in a normal galaxy that is our own and not far away at all, there were five best friends.

The first was the majestic ani, who had gathered them all together to play a wonderfully fun game together. Everyone loved ani even though he sometimes made the worst decisions as a mod and needs a co-mod who can sometimes slap his hand and say "No ani, that's a very bad idea."

The second was the most fairest and beautiful mod of all, the one and only xofelf. She was the mother of all the Mish Mash thread and though she may not always know the answer to absolutely everything, everyone asks her anyway because she's the best and easiest to talk to. This, of course, causes problems because everyone wants the pretty xof but she's a very busy woman! She ain't got time fo' all yo' shit! We all still love her anyways (even if she really truly does need to join the calls more often <3)

The third was the handsome and devilish pablito. And although I'm sure there is a nice, beautiful paragraph I could write about you, I sadly don't know you well enough to joke about anything Soon, though. Soon we will know each other and all will be right in the world again.

The fourth was Shadoweh. She uh... is Shadow. That's all there really is to say on the matter.

And finally, there was Piggy. Sweet and kind little Piggy that everyone keeps backstabbing EVEN THOUGH SHE'S STILL NEVER BETRAYED A SINGLE ALLY. I'M JUST SAIYAN!! WICKED RUDE GUYS!

In this normal universe, with these very normal five friends, playing this very normal game, there was a horrible, terrible, absolutely

tragic

accident. Pokemon Go was released. It was dark times, everyone exercising, going outside and playing in parks, catching all those pidgeys and rattatas. Absolutely awful! Someone had to do something! But everyone had been taken by the powerful force that is the Pokemon Company, and anyone with a smartphone was taken captive by the app, even if it wasn't available in their country yet!

Luckily, Shadow is 10,000 years old and still has a rustic old flip phone that doesn't even know what an app is! It was up to her to save the day! Sadly, she was not strong enough to overcome the force that is girl love and was swept away by xof and piggy, never to be seen again.

What a tragedy!

[PiggyGal15]

Make sure to follow all the links! And just think, this isn't even the final story :O

[PiggyGal15]

3 to xofffffff

(again)

[PiggyGal15]

3 to the xofs

[PiggyGal15]

I WILL FINISH THE FIC OF FANS WHEN I GET BACK FROM POKEMONING

[PiggyGal15]

So I get home, it starts thunder storming and now the powers out. So you'll get your story tomorrow!

[PiggyGal15]

*cracks fingers* Let's get this started.

---

You wake up alone which is a blessing you don't get often. Your name is DAVE STRIDER, and although that might not have always been your name, that's what it is now. You used to play a game with your friends, but it's over now. You won and there was rejoicing, but now you've all settled down.

This world has some new laws of physics and it's taken the lot of you a while to fully understand them. The worst of it all was the addition of some sort of soulmate bullshit. You don't really get it, but it pretty much solidified a lot of your friends' relationships.

The other thing you still don't really get is where your world is, exactly. Harley's tried explaining it to you several times, but it still just doesn't make sense. It seems like you've been thrust into some sort of pocket dimension where everything simultaneously exists and doesn't exist at the same time. Prime example of this is Rainbow Dash. Yes, the pony. You loved your bro, but you swear he somehow willed her into being because no other talking ponies exist except her. Worst of all, your bro is

soulmates

with the fucking pony. You suppose you shouldn't have been surprised, but you all were. You still say it's fucking weird, but he's happy so you let him be.

You're also confused about how some of the other "alpha" trolls exist but some don't. To everyone's horror - specifically Karkat's - Kankri is one of the few that do. You met the guy a couple times in the dream bubbles and heard even more about him from your best bro's rants. He's annoying, vexing, irritating and stubborn - or so you're told. Honestly, you don't really have a problem with the guy, he reminds you of what used to be Tumblr and so he just generally entertains you.

You hadn't really realized it, but after several months of "hanging out" with Kankri, Rose subtly asked you one day if he is your soulmate. You were baffled beyond belief. You? Kankri? Soulmates? Puh-lease, as if.

But the more you thought about it, the more you realized how true it was. In this new world, you aged until you met your soulmate, and then you stayed immortal for the rest of your life together. Most of your team hadn't really been fazed by this, already being immortal before even coming in to this system, so you hadn't noticed. You honestly hadn't noticed that you never aged after the game ended like you were supposed to.

During one of the long-winded rants that both Vantas' - much to Karkat's denial - are prone to do, Kankri actually realized you were bothered by something. Usually he never notices anything going on with the person he's talking

at

to, but it was just the icing on top of the obvious 'you-two-are-soulmates' cake that he noticed

your

feelings. Hell, not even you noticed your feelings half the time, so you consider that to be quite the feat.

You shrug noncommittally at him, feeling it's best to not mention anything and pretend the problem doesn't exist. It surprisingly works 9/10 times. You can still feel Kankri's eyes on you though, so it seems this is the one time out of ten that it's not gonna work.

You ask if he's ever really given thought to the soulmate bond of this universe. You notice a blush cross his face and instead of the speech on free will you were expecting, he merely just nods his head and continues to look at his hands. You're not sure what to do with a silent Vantas, over the years you've gotten to know exactly how to handle a Vantas in any sort of situation, but silence? Naw man, that rarely ever comes up, and the last time it did... well, let's just say when Karkat ended up with Jake, you were all very confused.

Kankri breaks his silence to ask you if you ever thought about what would happen if your soulmate died. You shrug and tell him about Rose and Kanaya's theory that you'd simply start aging again. Kankri looks over at you and very seriously says that he's been stuck at this age for far too long. You're kind of confused what he's getting at and agree that aging just a little more might be nice, but you were used to it. You sort of just ignored time these days, and were happy to have it ignore you.

That's when he leans over and for a second your heart stutters because you think he's going to kiss you. But no, the pain in your gut says otherwise. He stabs you again, and again, and again. You didn't think Kankri had this much strength and resolve to kill someone, but that's when you realize, it's not Kankri.

Spoiler: And you're not Dave.

"Love live the King." Doge says as he and Simba walk away, laughing their heads of.

dave, aka Roxy, aka stop being Homestuck characters in Survivor games, aka xof, is dead

[PiggyGal15]

Imma need an extension on this, not much longer. I'll probably write it tonight, at worst, tomorrow. Unless you guys don't want something of actual quality, but we all know SOTRY needs a conclusion, and I need alcohol to do so.

[PiggyGal15]

So I was supposed to get drunk with Shadow, BUT THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN, so I guess I'll have to write this sober *le sign*

[PiggyGal15]

YEAH BUT I HAVE AND YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO FIX THAT! Which you are <3 So SOTRY is delayed until I am sufficiently not-sober enough!

[PiggyGal15]

Why am I such a heavy weight I don't think there's enough alcohol in my house to get sufficiently not-sober enough :'(

[PiggyGal15]

[2:20:15 AM] Poisabi Nation: THER IE S A STORY AND ITDRFJG IS THE COMFLBOUCSION!
[2:20:44 AM] Poisabi Nation: PIGIGUGY GIRL YOU CAN DO IIT YOU ARE THEH NHERO IMF MY SOTRY!

[PiggyGal15]

I have had two glasses and I can sadly say, I'm still sober.

[PiggyGal15]

I'd say I need the hard stuff, but I'm drinking the hardest stuff I have This is the life of being a heavy weight guys. It's horrible.

[PiggyGal15]

What are you all talking about? Me not writing this story? Don't you realize I've already written it?

[PiggyGal15]

JOKES ON ALL OF YOU! THIS STORY IS NEVER GETTING WRITTEN! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[PiggyGal15]

SILENCE SHADOW! YOU ARE NEVER GETTING THE STORY

[PiggyGal15]

I WILL REPLY TO YOU IN THREAD IF I WANT TO, JUST TRY TO STOP ME

[PiggyGal15]

D': nooooooes! Don't end the call! I love you <3

[PiggyGal15]

I AM NOT TIPSY! NOPE! NOT AT ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

[PiggyGal15]

And then pablito dies FROM THE DRUNK MOTH. The End.

There, story written

(jk, I'll probably still write it, maybe... probably...)

[PiggyGal15]

THE REAL STORY BY THE PIGSSSIES WHO IS DEFINITELY STILL SOBER WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

ALSO I SHOULD JUST TURN ON MY CAPS LOCK, CAUSE THAT'D BE A LOT EASIER AND HURT MY PINKIE LESS SO THERE! CAPS LOCK A GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

SO THERE WAS ONECE THIS PEATUFITL GIRL WHOS NAME WAS PGIGY AND SHE WAS SURPRISINGLY NOT THE HERO OF THE STORY EVEN THO EVERY1 THOUGHT SHE WOULD BE! :O

SEE, PIGGY LOVED ALL THE GIRLS AND BOYS IN THE LAND, BUT SHE WASNT A MARY SUE, SO ACTUALLY THEY DIDNT. EXCEPT FOR LIKE, THE BEST ONES THAT SHE LOVES BECAUSE UNREQUITED LOVE IS THE WORST AND PLAGUES HER REAL LIFE AND SHES SO DONE WITH IT.

BUT ANYWAY, BACK TO THE STORY? i GUESS? OKAY.

SO THERE WERE THESE PEOPLE WHO DID THESE THINGS, AND THE GIRLS DECIDED THAT BOYS WERE ICKY AND GROSS (CAUSE THEY TOTES ARE) SO THEY TRIED TO GET RID OF THEM. SADLY, THE GIRLS TURNED ON EACH OTHER IN THE FIRST ROUND AND LOST ONE OF THE PRECIOUS GIRLSIES.

AND THEN THE SECOND ROUND THEY FUCKING KILLED OFF ANOTHER GIRL. WOW, THEY FUCKING SUCK AT THIS SHIT.

BUT THEN THINGS STARTED LOOKING UP WHEN SOME GUY WHO NO ONE KNOWS GET KILLED AND THEN THE REAL FUN WAS SUPPOSED TO START

BUT WOW, LOOK AT THAT. ANOTHER GIRL DIED. HOW WERE THESE GIRLS SUPPOSED TO GET ANYTHING DONE WHEN THEY KEEP KILLING EACH OTHER?

SO AFTER THAT THEY BANDED UP! FOR REALSIES THIS TIME! THEY KILLED OFF ANOTHER GUY THAT UH, WAS THERE? i GUESS? LOL.

THEN THE REAL STORY BEGAN WITH THE STORY THAT STARTED THE STORY TO BEGIN WITH, CAUSE THAT'S NOT CONFUSEING IN THE SLIGHTEST!!

AND OF COURSE THEN ANOTHER BOY BITES THE DUST

EXCEPT THEN WE HAD ANOTHER FUCKING COMBO BREAKER AND THE POOR POOR SHADOW WAS KILLED AND ALL THE TOWN MOURNED

SO PIGGY GOT HER REVENGE AND KILLED OFF A GIRL EVEN THO THAT WAS LIKE, TOTALLY AGAINST THE BLACK WIDOW'S ALLIANCE? bUT LIKE, PIGGY'S NEVER ALLOWED TO HAVE ONE OF THOSE, SO WHATEVER, I GUESS. IT'S COOL. i DON'T CARE WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

AND SO HERE WE ARE. IN THE FINAL ROUND. 1V1 THE LAST GIRL AND THE LAST BOY.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

PIGGY GRABBED AN ICICLE FROM XOF'S STASH AND STABBED PABLITO IN THE HEART WITH IT, REIGNING SUPREME CHAMPION AND ALSO SHE HAS NO IDEA WHAT SHE JUST WROTE. i REALLY HOPE I DIDN'T OFFEND ANYONE! HAHA, LATER SUCKERS!

[PiggyGal15]

BELIEVE IT

[PiggyGal15]

don't lie, you didn't even eat the moth (gdi I keep wanting to type month)

[PiggyGal15]

100% truth

[PiggyGal15]

And then pablito dies FROM THE DRUNK MOTH. The End.

There, story written

(jk, I'll probably still write it, maybe... probably...)

I just realized, this probably makes no sense without first knowing

[1:13:37 AM] Poisabi Nation: OH MY GOD A MOTH FELL INTO MY COFFEE DRINK
[1:13:50 AM] Poisabi Nation: I poured out a bit of it after scooping it out <<
[1:13:52 AM] Poisabi Nation: im sure its fine

[PiggyGal15]

I still love how in the player list, it says "

Red is dead.

" but none of them are coloured.

[PiggyGal15]

D: gdi Red