LSG Character Poll 2022

[Searl]

by popular demand

[Searl]

Alex: And after the results of round 2, let’s take a quick peek at where the scores sit. In first place is xofelf with $2050. In second place is CaptainMeme with $2000. And in third place is Malkon with $1500. It was quite the riveting round, and even though no one has a clear lead yet, xofelf currently leads with a slight advantage.

Xofelf: Just to be clear, if I win, you will give me this amount of money, yes?

Alex: …that is what I said. Did you not read the contract?

Xofelf: What contract?

Alex: The one you signed to be on the show?

Xofelf: Oh you mean that thing that said “Yes I will play, give me money?”

Alex: Yes the contract!

Xofelf: I mean I guess so. Whatever just don’t short me. I gotta make that dollar stretch.

Alex: Dollars don’t stretch.

Xofelf: It’s a saying, Monty. But also, yes they do, just only once.

Alex: For the love of god I’m not Monty, I’m Alex Trebek.

Xofelf: Whatever you say, you better pay me. I know where you live.

Alex: Well first you need to win. *gives terrible gameshow wink*

Xofelf: *shudders*

Alex: And at the end of the last round, Malkon scored the final point. Which means this time Malkon will take the first shot at the next category. Whenever you are ready.

Malkon: Okay umm…22-13 for $600.

Alex: And that is *loud annoying noise* a Double Your Risk, Double Your Reward space.

Malkon: What the fuck was that?!

Alex: It’s a sound effect.

Malkon: Sounded like a blaring bomb alarm. Jesus.

Alex: Jesus was in last year’s show, we’re focusing on you now! As having a Double You Risk, Double Your Reward, you get to wager an amount from 1 to 1500. If you get the question right, you earn double your bid. If you get it wrong, you lose the amount you bid. Any questions?

Malkon: No, I bid it all.

*audience gasping*

Alex: are you sure? That’s really risky.

Malkon: This game is named Risk vs Reward. What kind of gambler would I be if I didn’t risk it all *breaks fourth wall looking directly at the camera*.

Alex: Fair enough. Okay, for double or nothing, am I the real Alex Trebek?

*xofelf and CaptainMeme look angry*

Malkon: …Yes?

Alex: Is that your final answer?

Malkon: Yes.

Alex: Congrats you get double your money!

*Tables get flipped as the other contestants look like they want to burn down the entire studio*

CaptainMeme: THATS NOT EVEN TRUE.

Xofelf: THIS IS RIGGED.

Malkon: I WROTE THE DAMN SCRIPT.

Alex: Okay everyone calm down. Let’s get on with the game shall we? Malkon choose the next category.

*CaptainMeme and xofelf are foaming at the mouth in anger*

Malkon: I choose…

[Cephrir]

ermine robbed (i would say this even if she won)

[Thestatusquo]

Lotito and sif robbed tbh.

[Thestatusquo]

Ermine should have been like 40.

[Cephrir]

fight me

[Thestatusquo]

ok.

[Thestatusquo]

ermine and wendy were almost identical as characters.

[Thestatusquo]

Remaining Charactrs.

RVR

Gebura
HTS
Furiosa
Amelia
Janet

AC

Red Panda
Sand cat
Fennec Fox
Slow Lorris
Jerboa
Sugar Glider
Harp Seal

[flow trap]

Lotito and sif robbed tbh.

I concur

[Cephrir]

TEAM YELL

[ambic]

Michel can never be robbed. He already ate the treasury.

[Malkon05]

Alex: Going into the penultimate round the scores are as follows. Malkon has $3000. Didn’t earn a single dollar after that wildly exciting Double round.

*Malkon glares*

Alex: xofelf has $2950 and CaptainMeme has $3200. It’s a very close race right now for that ultimate price of cash cash cash!

CaptainMeme: I’ll kick you in the arse arse arse.

Xof: *snickers* good one.

Alex: *through gritted teeth* keep that up and I’ll make sure your money mysteriously ends up in the pockets of Adorable Critters.

Malkon: so hostlike of you. Can we get on with it? I have *looks at fake calendar* so many hours of nothing to do to get to.

*canned laughter*

Alex: Yes I do think we should probably start winding down. This is the final round before our final category. And as much fun as the three of you have been *dripping with sarcasm*, I think it’s time we really see which of you truly is the one who will risk the most to get the most reward. What are you willing to risk? *grins*

CaptainMeme: …Why don’t I like the tone of this right now?

Alex: Oh but you will. *slides over like some sort of demented Willy Wonka to a nearby shelf and pulls something off* On the other end of this line *holds out a phone* your most prized possession exists. If you do not risk it all, then they will pay the consequence.

Xof: What kind of fucked up Saw shit is this?

Alex: Just you wait. *hands the phone to Malkon* Your most prized possession.

Malkon: *listens a moment and nods* I understand, my 30 piece sushi platter needs me.

Alex: Your turn *hands the phone to xofelf*

Xof: *gasps* The 96th flirtationship how did you know?!

Alex: I have my ways, I have my ways. And finally *hands phone to CaptainMeme*

CaptainMeme: KEBERT XELA?!

Alex: …what the fuck?

CaptainMeme: Sorry was just trying it for good measure. I mean oh no, not the entire nation of Great Britain!

*dun dun duuuuuunnnnnnnn*

*All three contestants look aghast*

Xof: So what is it we have to do?

Alex: You will all participate in a singular question. In order to save your most prized possession, you must risk them. If you fail, they DIE. If you win, then you get them back. That will be your reward.

Malkon: Does that mean I get 60 piece sushi platter if I win?

Xof: Does that mean I get another 96 flirtationships?

CaptainMeme: Does that mean I get to double the square milage of Great Britain thus becoming ruler by proxy of annexation and restoring the British Empire to its former glory??

Alex: Sure yes, all of that. But first, you must answer this question…

*everyone is listening*

Alex: Which listmod is the best listmod on all of MS?

*everyone just stares at Alex for a moment*

Xof: …me?

CaptainMeme: Cephrir?

Malkon: …D none of the above?

Alex: …and those are your final answers?

Everyone: Yes?

Alex: …you sure there’s not someone whose name starts with oh I don’t know, M throwing it out there.

Xof: *glares at him* Monty. I swear to god. I’ll--

Alex: Congratulations Xof is correct! This means they have won the risk vs reward bonus round and their 96th flirtationship lives!

Malkon: B-but what about the sushi?

CaptainMeme: Did I just single handedly end the reign of my home country?

Alex: No no no that was all just a little fun. *chuckles*

*Everyone glares at him*

Alex: Okay I can see my little joke did not go over as well as I hoped, let’s begin the penultimate round with the 12-4 category, Xof please start us off.

Xof: I swear to god I’m firing you the moment I can. You’ll be hearing from my Zoraster Lawyers. Anyways let’s end this, start with $600.

Alex: For $600, your first question in the 12-4 category is…

[SalTheBard]

Gandolf

EDIT: I was expecting to be rated low for RVR, was not expecting to be rated so highly in AC. Thanks everyone!

[Lady Lambdadelta]

Team Yell vs Jerboa

Honestly, I'm so proud and happy to be up here at the top with Gebura.

[Thestatusquo]

Finished same here as in my game.

[ambic]

Is it Gebura, Jerboa, Hunt as top 3! I thought Team Yell meant Janets allies at first lol, but nope

[Thestatusquo]

3) gebura
2) HTS
1) jerboa is my prediction.

Wouldn't be surprised to see 1 and 2 flipped though.

[Lady Lambdadelta]

honestly, Ambic and I being on top together here makes me happy either way, I'd love to win, but I'd be happy to see Ambic or Gebura win

[Searl]

Alex: And here we have quite the final round! Everyone has somehow miraculously ended up with exactly $6969.

*a collective “nice” can be heard*

Alex: This means it will all come down to the final category, “3-1” to decide who will be the ultimate winner in this episode of *holds hand to ear like a fucking stereotypical gameshow host*

Rando voices in the distance: RISK. VS. REWARD!

*lots of canned applause and cheering*

Malkon: One day I too will learn the secrets of where the cans of laughter and applause are.

Alex: *blinks* Anyways, this final category will put every bit of your knowledge to the test. You are going to have to risk harder than you’ve ever risk before. You’ll have to reward faster than you’ve ever rewarded.

Xof: You’ll have to versus until you’re too tired to stand? *smirks*

Alex: How did you know? Are you psychic?

Xof: Not my first rodeo with double entendres.

Alex: Well, whatever it would be kind of cool if you were psychic.

CaptainMeme: *takes a step forward and puffs out chest* I AM A PSYCHIC.

Alex: Random but okay, let’s roll with it, what am I going to say next?

CaptainMeme: KEBERT-

Alex: Oh for the love of mishmash, shut up.

CaptainMeme: Tch fine. You bloody ruin all the fun anyways.

Alex: Now, as I was saying earlier, you will be tested more than you have before to determine if you will take home the prize. Are you three ready?

CaptainMeme: Aye.

Xof: Whatever Monty.

Malkon: 69.

*canned response “nice”*

Malkon: Yes I am now ready.

Alex: You have one minute to write a response and then we will reveal if you win. You must also write a wager, you can wager up to the amount you have. Are there any questions?

*all three shake head no*

Alex: Before we start, please write your wager. *waits until they are all done* Alright then, here is your final question, good luck!

*the screen flips revealing the question*

Question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

*all three contestants blink and stare for at least 30 seconds before writing stuff*

*the timer goes off*

Alex: Okay let’s see the responses. Starting with xofelf…

*screen flips up*

Alex: What is…the chicken? No sorry that’s incorrect. How much did you wager? Oof all of your money? Too bad. Guess you aren’t getting paid.

Xof: Do you want to keep being a listmod? *gives a sassy look*

Alex: H-heh, moving on, CaptainMeme what was your response? What is…the egg? No sorry that’s incorrect. How much did you wager? All but one dollar. Well you are sitting in second place.

CaptainMeme: Ha I beat you.

Xof: Shut up.

Alex: And finally, Malkon what was your response? What is… *squints*

Malkon: Say it.
Alex: Ytnom? AHHHHH *everything goes wild as suddenly Alex Trebek/Monty vanishes from this dimension*

*Xof and CaptainMeme look at Malkon with gaping jaws*

Malkon: Guess he was Monty afterall.

*breaks the fourth wall and looks into the camera*

And from the entire COTY team, we want to thank you for all that have tuned in. Monty can’t hurt you anymore, it’s time to reveal who the real winner is.

Xof: *breaks another fourth wall* this person holds a very special place in our hearts.

CaptainMeme: *breaks another fourth wall and the audience begins to wonder just how many fourth walls there are* and was a bloody good character this year.

In unison: Please welcome, the new Character of the Year, the real answer to the Category 3-1…

Spoiler: 3rd

Spoiler: 2nd

Spoiler: Character of the Year

[Malkon05]

Congratulations <3

[Thestatusquo]

HTS was robbed (of second)

Congrats though to AMBIC GYPYX and LADY LAMBDADELTA!

All three great characters.

[flow trap]

Congrats to Gerbua and Jebora

Wait that's not right

[Lady Lambdadelta]

I'll take bronze to those two <3

[ambic]

Thank you so much. Jerboa was so much fun. When I was Lorenz in 3 houses (which i was trainwreck in) someone (ashe?) told me i was chaos and that i should either work hard to remove that from my game, or lean into it hard. I think y’all can tell what i chose. Bounce-bounce

This really means a lot to me <3