You have two cows.

[McStab]

Blacklist: You have two cows. They refuse to be milked at the same time or near each other because of past bad milking experiences.

[kuribo]

Mod: You have two cows. One hasn't posted in some time, even after a prod, so you had to request a replacement. A goat PMed you asking for the spot.

Wouldn't that be a cattle prod?

[saulres]

No, the cattle prod was issued before the replacement was required

Hydra: You have two cows, but they post as one, generating much discussion as to whether they should be permitted.

Dead Thread: You have two cows and a bunch of mourning Hindus.

[Rhinox]

GP2: homooooooooooooooos

[Mastermind of Sin]

Abandoned Game: Your cows have eaten all the grass and no one cares.

[ProsecutorGodot]

Vanilla townie: You are a cow.

[Lyrebird]

Deputy/nurse/one of those backup roles: You are a calf. Witnessing your parent's death will cause you to mature beyond your years.

[Empking]

Doctor: You have two cows. They're both amnesia-inducing ninjas.

[D3f3nd3r]

Bastard Modding: You have too many cows to keep so you torture some.

[Korts]

The Hive: someone let loose a couple of cows, and now there's bullshit everywhere. So let's talk about forming a committee to discuss whether we need to ask mith to appoint someone to clean up.

[Mastermind of Sin]

MeMe: You used to take care of all the cows, but now you've finally been able to go out to pasture yourself and enjoy a little time off.

[Telo]

Telo: On the board I'm from you get two cows every 24hrs.

[ProsecutorGodot]

ProsecutorGodot: You have two cows and I want to barbecue them. Wait...no, I wanna barbecue HIS cows...wait...now I'm sure I wanna barbecue your cows. Yep, we're roasting your cows, we have evidence of their antics...oh, crap, they were good cows after all...let's get rid of someone else's cows. Don't look at me like that.

[saulres]

saulres: You have two cows, who haven't posted in exactly as much time as the mod indicated that prods would be sent out after.

@Mod: Could you please prod my cows?

[HezLucky]

Fate: I HAVE ALL THE COWS NOW YOU CHEEKY SCUMFUCK EHUEHUEHUEHEHEHEHEH

Best thing in the thread by far.

[Jarvis]

Fate: You have two SHEEP ME YOU TOWN FUCKS

EMUEMUEMUEMUEMUEMUEMUE

[drmyshotgun]

Drmyshotgun: You have two cows. You claim they're not someone else's.

[horrordude0215]

WIFOM: You have two cows. You must eat one, and if you pick the wrong one you die. The position of said cows has been predetermined by me.

[Rhinox]

In Soviet Russia, 2 cows have you.

[gorckat]

Knock knock
Who's there?
Moo
Moo who?
No- Two Moo

[izakthegoomba]

Bear Grylls: You have two cows. Their urine tastes good.

[Empking]

Shaft.ed: You have two cows. You milk them for all they're worth.

[IceGuy]

Empking: Two cows

[izakthegoomba]

IceGuy: you have two cows, most commonly sighted in Open Setup Ideas and Discussion.

[Faraday]

Mastin2:

You have 2 the most common type of large domesticated ungulates. They are a prominent modern member of the subfamily Bovinae, are the most widespread species of the genus Bos, and are most commonly classified collectively as Bos primigenius. Cattle are raised as livestock for meat (beef and veal), as dairy animals for milk and other dairy products, and as draft animals (oxen or bullocks) (pulling carts, plows and the like). Other products include leather and dung for manure or fuel. In some countries, such as India, cattle are sacred. From as few as eighty progenitors domesticated in southeast Turkey about 10,500 years ago, it is estimated that there are now 1.3 billion cattle in the world today. In 2009, cattle became the first livestock animal to have a fully mapped genome.

Cattle did not originate as the term for bovine animals. It was borrowed from Old French catel, itself from Latin caput, head, and originally meant movable personal property, especially livestock of any kind, as opposed to real property (the land, which also included wild or small free-roaming animals such as chickens — they were sold as part of the land). The word is closely related to "chattel" (a unit of personal property) and "capital" in the economic sense. The term replaced earlier Old English feoh "cattle, property" (cf. German: Vieh, Gothic: faihu).
The word cow came via Anglo-Saxon cū (plural cȳ), from Common Indo-European gʷōus (genitive gʷowes) = "a bovine animal", compare Persian Gâv, Sanskrit go, Welsh buwch. The genitive plural of "cū" is "cȳna", which gave the now archaic English plural, and Scots plural, of "kine".

Mina

: Um, well I'm not really sure. I'm not very good at working out who's a cow or not? I

think

I have 2 cows but they could as easily be sheep. AAAAAAAAAAAAAH. I hate this game. Why did you make me play? Why do I have to have 2 cows anyway? This is stupid. I hate you.

Regfan

:
Town (S->W) Cow, Cow, Cow, Cow, Cow, Cow
Null (S>W) Cow, Cow, Cow.
Scum (S>W) Cow, Cow