Planet: MafiaScum 2 - Winter 2018

[chesskid3]

@TS: sure. We should wait for a reply from/ask the rest of okkezia

@RP sure

[animorpherv1]

Meh, why not @TS

[Robotnick2]

Well, that certainly has been a dramatic read

Begin diplomatic transmission

Elewynn

would like to announce her spending budget for this quarter:

• £2.5bn
  to
  Education
  .
  
• £1bn
  to
  general upkeep
  .
  
• £1bn
  to the development of
  rare earth metal extraction
  .
  
• £1bn
  to the development of
  natural gas extraction
  .
  
• £1.75bn
  to the research of
  Nuclear Fusion
  for use in nuclear power plants.
  
• £1bn
  to the research of a
  Tricorder
  for use in medical establishments.
  
• £1bn
  to the research of
  Non-Lethal Weaponry
  for the protection of
  Elewynn
  .
  
• £1bn
  to the research of
  Reverse Osmosis
  for the purification of water.
  
• £250m
  to set up a referendum for all
  Elewyy
  citizens concerning the full nationalisation of universities in
  Elewyy
  , results to be collected next quarter.

This nationalisation move will, we feel, give the

Cardinal Convocation

more power in moderating the quality of our education, such that we can continue to be the best educational system in the whole of Gazebo.

End diplomatic transmission

[TS]

Utilise the patent lawyers to patent nuclear fusion

[chesskid3]

Mail Robotnick some rogaine

[JDGA]

(FTR if you make a QT, please send it to us!)

[JDGA]

Castelia would like to report that some experimental and highly dangerous pun-related technology has been stolen from one of its research laboratories. Our authorities are tracking down the culprit as we speak.

[inspiratieloos]

"Welcome to the Orthel Public Broadcasting News. Sorry for interrupting your scheduled program, but we've got breaking news on the satellite launch.

If you tuned in last night, you'll recall that last night we had live footage of liftoff, and if the weather was clear in your area, you may have even caught a glimpse of the bright light moving across the sky. Well, we've got good news. The lead scientists and engineers of the Gazebo Orbiter have just confirmed that the satellite is in a stable orbit around Gazebo. This is a tremendous breakthrough for space exploration, and Orthel hopes to gather a plethora of data from our satellite. This mission is only the first of many, and the council hopes to send a manned mission into space in the not so distant future.

You've heard it here first, folks. Orthel's the first nation to hold an unmanned space mission, and the first nation to successfully put an object into a stable orbit around Gazebo. Tune in to the news at six to get the full story. Now back to your regularly scheduled OPB program."

[orcinus_theoriginal]

Meh, why not @TS

WE ARE OK WITH THIS

[JDGA]

Castelia has discovered that the man behind the theft of this technology is none other than "Drench" - since our initial report, we have learned that he has reverse-engineered the technology to hijack the nation of Phiranye. Drench now calls himself President Puntin IV, and seemingly every one of Phiranye's 20 120 180 citizens now answer to the flag of PUNATHEIA. The pun-powers of this were so extreme that they apparently caused all of this to happen a year ago, so as of today absolutely nothing has changed.

In short, Super Mario is out, and please welcome Drench! He has £30 billion to spend.

[Drench]

Well, that's certainly...doused...Super Mario's run, hasn't it? Looks like he's......shelled.......out big-time.

Here all week. And beyond. For a few years.

President Puntin cordially invites world leaders to his Pun Palace for fun, games and a pun contest, with the winner receiving a $20 voucher to the local milk bar. Or you can just PM him: it's your call!

[Lord Mhork]

Good day, Mr. President.

~Ambassador Tor'Kin, Face to the World

[JDGA]

Well, that's certainly...doused...Super Mario's run, hasn't it? Looks like he's......shelled.......out big-time.

(oh god this was the worst idea)

[JasonWazza]

Castelia would like to report that some experimental and highly dangerous pun-related technology has been stolen from one of its research laboratories. Our authorities are tracking down the culprit as we speak.

This made it seem like something OTHER then a replacement >.>

[JasonWazza]

Also welcome blah blah blah

You know the drill

[Drench]

Well, that's certainly...doused...Super Mario's run, hasn't it? Looks like he's......shelled.......out big-time.

(oh god this was the worst idea)

this is going to be so great

[Magua]

Let it be said, ah, that even though we don't pay too much attention to the outside world, the pundits in Swizzerland are all atwitter over these latest developments. We look forward to seeing what happens upun the new President's arrival. Hopefully, it can be met with, ah, punderous applause.

[animorpherv1]

Hi Drench

Morphia welcomes President Putin.

[orcinus_theoriginal]

*Puntin

[Drench]

You best start...............Russian.............................to fix your error

[animorpherv1]

I'm sorry Mr. Puntin.

[animorpherv1]

In addition, starting next week:

2 billion a week into general upkeep
2 billion a week into tourism
Throw half of any money remaining at the end of the week(real life week) into the national bank, and the other half into tourism.

Scratch the weekly 2B into tourism, and throw it into a private emergency fund instead

Saving for the future, folks.

[Magua]

President Puntin, with all, ah, due respect, we feel that the amount of space you put around some of your words is pauseitively too much.

[Drench]

Ah, I still haven't spent any money. I better do that: don't want to be ka-ching myself out.

£2.5m creating a new form of currency equal to the £ in every way except it uses the $ instead. This covers reprinting costs: the new bills will be phased in over the coming years to avoid rampant inflation, but the $ change is immediate.
$3b in general upkeep: any leftover money to be set aside in a rainy-day fund for emergencies.
An additional $2b is to be placed in this rainy-day fund immediately.
$500+m on a Productivity Audit* to discover the best ways of improving Punatheia from hereon in. This Audit is to be carried out by a Productivity Commission. If $500m is not sufficient, the rainy-day fund may be used to cover the rest. The Audit will analyze as its main priorities resource management, the economy, education systems within Punatheia, the quality of life within Punatheia as related to income and status, and future prospects.
$500+m on a Productivity Commission, staffed by independent public servants, with the power to seek advice from experts in various disciplines in order to help carry out their directed goals of finding ways of improving productivity and the quality of life within Punatheia. If $500m is not sufficient, the rainy-day fund may be used to cover the rest.
$2b to create an Sky Institute: the Institute's purpose is to study anything to do with the sky, whether it be space, climate change or weather, or perhaps something beyond. The Institute may be legislatively directed, but remains an independent frontier of science within Punatheia.
Law: Any unspent money is to be stored in the rainy-day fund at period's conclusion.

really proud of that delegation ngl

[JasonWazza]

You realize you have 30 billion right?

And you spent like, 9 billion?