Graveyard Shift Mafia - ROLL CREDITS

[FourteenPointFive]

Hey so, fuck the day shift.

[xRECKONERx]

BirdAndBeast need to be town.

[Dry-fit]

BRO gets the hammer but we can lynch Zoraster whenever. I would like to see iamausername check in first.

BirdAndBeast's reaction to Serene's fakeclaim didn't look town at all.

Dry-Fit comes in and refuses to respond to Zor. It's like scum are lining themselves up for us!

Titus is dead. She claimed cop with a guilty on Zoraster. There is literally nothing more regarding Titus to discuss unless you feel like she was gambitting (believe Zoraster), or you wish to stir up nonsensical distractions for the town.

AGar just wants to throw up as much shit against me as he can. It doesn't matter if he contradicts himself. As if responding to Zoraster's bullshit, which you know is bullshit, would amount to anything other than a distraction for town.

[BROseidon]

Will content tomorrow. I followed the day shift more than the past two.

Serene's either a lyncher or Usurper to BnB; this makes me think there was some degree of trolling from the mods when they assigned roles.

Because if I wanted to laugh my ass off at a game, I would make kuribo a lyncher to AP.

[Dry-fit]

At this rate I'm not sure it is a given night shift will be able to muster up two votes.

[hiplop]

Gah this is ridiculous. Why isn't zoraster dead?

[hiplop]

BirdAndBeast need to be town.

hm? why?

I dont really have a read on the guy. literally i have like a 50/50 mindset like everything he does could go either way.

if serene is actually a lyncher, that is quite possibly the best thing ever.

Sven zepher and Jesters are almost definitely town.

the goat rubs me off as weird. but he kinda townslipped too so :s

AGar is probably my biggest scum read that isn't zoraster, seems to be trying to distract the town in a harmful way

[The Goat]

Weird?

Well, maybe a little.

vote Zoraster

[The Goat]

BirdAndBeast need to be town.

hm? why?

I dont really have a read on the guy. literally i have like a 50/50 mindset like everything he does could go either way.

if serene is actually a lyncher, that is quite possibly the best thing ever.

Sven zepher and Jesters are almost definitely town.

the goat rubs me off as weird. but he kinda townslipped too so :s

AGar is probably my biggest scum read that isn't zoraster,

seems to be trying to distract the town in a harmful way

Example, please?

[The Goat]

Please note that Zoraster is now at L-1. No accidental hammering by anyone other than BROseidon.

[zoraster]

VOTE: Zoraster

Okay, okay. You caught me. I'm obviously scum. Didn't really think i had much chance there, but figured I might as well try.

I'm Rebecca Berrie, the Assistant Manager Who Has Hobbies That Interfere With Her Work (Secret Traitor). Apparently I flip Goon, but if I hammer myself and certain (unspecified) event(s) occur, I get to come back to life as an IC. Unfortunately, I do not actually know my scummates. So help a brother out and figure out how to get that.

[The Critic]

It is now a Night Shift.

Aronis
BROseidon
Dry-fit
FourteenPointFive
hiplop
iamausername
PeregrineV
The Goat
xRECKONERx
zoraster

Episode 1, Shift A.6 (Night), VC 2

zoraster (11) - Zdenek, Aronis, xRECKONERx, PeregrineV, hiplop, ika, BirdAndBeast, Infinite Jesters, Venmar, The Goat, zoraster

Bird and Beast (1) - FourteenPointFive
Aronis (2) - iamausername, Dry-fit
Serene2 (1) - ~Jordan`
MrZepher (1) - Svenskt Stål

Not Voting (5): MrZepher, BROSeidon, Brian Skies, AGar, Serene2
With 21 alive, it is 11 to lynch.

The Shift will switch in (expired on 2014-04-14 23:00:00).
The Episode will end in (expired on 2014-04-18 23:00:00).

Searching for a replacement for ~Jordan'.

(The Retiree is twirling the umbrella from his fruity drink while reclining in a chair)

Rebecca: Why aren't you working!?

Retiree: Piss off.

Rebecca: I asked you three days ago to do the presentation for the Haims account. How's that coming?

Retiree: About as well as your husband.

Rebecca: INAPPROPRIATE.

Retiree: You're really harshing my mellow right now, dear.

Rebecca: Okay that being said YOU NEED TO DO THIS REPORT!

Retiree: Make me.

Rebecca: I'll get the bosses to fire you! You won't get the retirement package!

Retiree: I'll tell them about your meth habit.

Rebecca: ...what meth habit?

Retiree: Come on Becky, we know you ride the blue horse.

Rebecca: Okay first of all it's only blue on Breaking Bad.

Retiree: So you know a lot about meth?

Rebecca: NO I DON'T AND YOU CAN'T PROVE IT.

Retiree: We'll see, honey.

Rebecca: WE WILL INDEED!

(Rebecca storms off. The Retiree picks up the phone on his desk)

Retiree: Hey Mr Producer. Is drug use still not okay with your network? Because I have quite the news for you....

zoraster,

Rebecca Berrie, the Assistant Manager Who Has Hobbies That Interfere With Her Work (

Mafia Goon

)

, kicked off the show Shift A.6

There will be a 24 hour break until the next episode.

[The Critic]

And now a word from our sponsors!

(Some light jazz music over a black screen. Fade into an average American kitchen. A man in a black suit walks into frame.)

MAN. Hey there TV land. My name is Core P. Tool, and I'm a corporate tool from Minty Mints, the minty freshest company in the minty fresh US of A.

(A woman in a red and white checkered dress walks into frame wearing American flags in her hair.)

MAN. This is my wife, Fanny Datass Tool, with whom I am having a wholesome heterosexual relationship. Just like we always do in America and I don't care what anyone says about fags and biological imperatives.

WOMAN. Tee hee! What's a biological?

MAN. Hush now Fanny; men are talking.

(He pats her on the butt)

MAN. Now run off and do the heterosexual cooking. Just as our God Ronald Reagan intended. (aside) She's 1/69th Cherokee. Minty Mints is a diverse company.

WOMAN. Maybe later you can pump that baby into me like you promised!

MAN. Ha ha now Fanny we talked about Standards and Practices.

WOMAN. I'm just a simple housewife I don't know what a standard or a practice is.

MAN. Isn't your pie burning?

WOMAN. No dear, the doctor said that'd be a week and it's been-

MAN. NOT WHAT I MEANT anyway TV land we really should get back on topic: our newest minty flavor that will be ham handedly featured in the television program that you're watching: Peppermerica Mint. It's the mint that tastes like freedom.

WOMAN. It's true! I read it in the bible!

MAN. Indeed you did, Fanny. Anyway America, this is the mint that you're all required by law to buy. Consume. Don't ask questions. Fanny?

(Fanny removes her dress and reveals red white and blue tassles on her nipples. She begins twirling them.)

MAN. Whoring out your woman is fine with God as long as it's in the service of your corporate masters. Don't forget, America, CONSUME CONSUME CONSUME.

(Fanny begins deep throating a red white and blue popsicle.)

WOMAN. If there's one thing I love, it's the taste of freedom.

MAN. Indeed you do! Stay tuned for the next episode, America. And if you don't mind, I'm going to go have sex with my wife.

(Pause.)

MAN. America.

(Black out.)

[The Critic]

(A group of men and women are standing around a craft services area)

BEST BOY. It's a shame about Thomas.

GAFFER. He's gone?

BEST BOY. How did you not know?

GAFFER. I had to take my dog to therapy yesterday.

BEST BOY. Your dog goes to therapy?

GAFFER. He's a shelter dog. Lots of issues.

BEST BOY. Yeah but it's a dog.

GAFFER. He's a dog, and he has a name.

BEST BOY. I really don't care.

GAFFER. His name is Lieutenant Scruffy.

BEST BOY. How can you afford that?

GAFFER. My cocaine budget has been severely reduced.

BEST BOY. You must really love that dog.

GAFFER. Lieutenant Scruffy.

BEST BOY. Anyway yeah. Thomas got the business end of an inappropriate workplace conduct violation.

GAFFER. If there was a movie about that guy's life it'd be called A Dick Too Far.

BEST BOY. Why does it have to be a war movie?

GAFFER. Because he spends a lot of his time cleaning guns.

BEST BOY. Har!

GAFFER. Anyway, our break is about up. Should probably get in there.

BEST BOY. Hey would you like a mint?

GAFFER. Not really.

BEST BOY. Are you sure? They taste like freedom.

GAFFER. Um.

BEST BOY. But actually we're required to have these on set or we'll get fired. Try to leave a tin in the shot if you can.

GAFFER. Why decided that?

BEST BOY. The producer. Something about sponsorship and corporate fascism. Anyway do it or you'll get fired.

GAFFER. What, are you going to tell on me?

BEST BOY. We are minty mints. We are legion.

GAFFER. ... so I'm gonna go.

BEST BOY. Don't forget your mints!

It is now a Day Shift.

~Jordan’
AGar
Bird and Beast
Brian Skies
ika
infinite jesters
MrZepher
Serene2
Svenskt Stal
Venmar
Zdenek

With 20 alive, it is 11 to lynch.

The Shift will switch in (expired on 2014-04-17 23:00:00).
The Episode will end in (expired on 2014-05-01 23:00:00).

[BirdAndBeast]

Same shifts. Well thats not extremely unexpected in hindsight, although annoying.

Thegoat continues to be town by giving Zoraster the chance to hammer himself and not realizing that could happen. Also lol at Zoraster's last post.

Haven't talked to mastin at all, but she seems uninterested in lynching Serene whereas they'd probably be my preferred lynch Today for the heinous crimes of (Lunacy, Faking a guilty on us, Claiming 3rd party in a half serious way, Trying to lynch Jordan for some reason)

I'm paranoid as hell about Brian although probably shouldnt be. Ika too. Im basically paranoid about everyone on our shift except Jesters.

Ugh, mirror mirror on the wall. Who's the scummiest fuck of them all.

VOTE: Dry-fit.

Since I still feel good about that one I think. Turned on us for "our reaction to Serene being bad". Lol excuse me? I was calling their claim meaningless all Day and I was right. Take a long walk off a short gallows.

[BirdAndBeast]

I guess if I had to guess about the meaning of the shifts staying the same...well obv it makes sense to put me and Serene on the same shift regardless of our alignments. Its plausible there are more scum on night shift than Day? Cause I sort of feel like we'd default to lynchingon Day today since we are the active shift and sorta going at each other. Night shift is more coasting. So ya totally good with Dryfit vote for now. I think we're null on PV/Aronis, more nulltown on Pv, nullscum on Aronis. Reckoner is still probstown for softclaim. Goat is town.

Dry-fit. Prob scum.
Hiplop. Need to reevaluate, but leaning scummy. Mastin disagrees I think.
Aronis. Meh scum.
---
Username Meh-town
PV meh-town?
--
Reckoner probtown
Goat Probtown
14.5 Townread, though unsure
BRO town

[Venmar]

Strongly reconsidering my stance on BirdAndBeast, his response to Serene's lyncher claim was bad. His #1189 is also all over the place and generally bad, and his "paranoia" of Brian, and everyone else seems unwaranted and generally seems shady and most likely not that legitimate. He also, not as much, but slightly, is reeling a bit from his enormous scumread pile of like 5 people, backing off of a couple of us and wishwashing his read on Hiplop. (You know, the horrid post of #597 where he decides to call out an entire scumteam?)

Although, I still think AGar is more scummy... ummm...

Vote: AGar

[BirdAndBeast]

his response to Serene's lyncher claim was bad.

Im taking zero of this shit today cause Im already halfway pissed off from Titus thinking we were retarded and fell for her "reap" when I actually fucking guessed what was going on correctly and cited rules and tried to cut through bullshit to back it up.

So ya, anyone saying my reaction to having yet another shit claim from Serene be bad can justify that or Im tunneling you until you die. Dryfit can justify why me not giving a shit about their fakeclaim is bad when I was right to.

[BirdAndBeast]

"reap" = "trap"

[BirdAndBeast]

and his "paranoia" of Brian, and everyone else seems unwaranted and generally seems shady and most likely not that legitimate

Wow, you literally just said the same thing three times. How are you fluffing so hard on this. Either you believe me or you don't. Im actually town and actually mentioned these things in the QT because its true... and anyone who has played with me before knows that paranoia is the name of my game. So ya you can try and tell me that this time it looks fake, but thats a weak-ass case and some bullshit excuse for a read on me.

Im actually 100% ok with lynching Venmar today, hes scum.

[Serene2]

vote: birdandbeast

Still needs rope.

[Serene2]

And that attempt at a town slip was just A+ play from you there

I don't believe your "WHY U SO SAME SHIFT" crap when the rules plainly state that they stay the same for 8 shifts

[Serene2]

and his "paranoia" of Brian, and everyone else seems unwaranted and generally seems shady and most likely not that legitimate

Im actually town and actually mentioned these things in the QT because its true...

You mean the scum QT right

[Svenskt Stål]

Weird?

Well, maybe a little.

vote Zoraster

Please note that Zoraster is now at L-1. No accidental hammering by anyone other than BROseidon.

This is a scum claim.

[Serene2]

Why was it a scum claim when he did it but not when I did it the previous shift?