Team Mafia 2015 Winners: Young and Beautiful

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READY AS FUCK

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If it's randomly chosen instead of first come first served, why not just open signups now?

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Ummm are we supposed to be confirming our teams?

Presenting THE COCKETTES

Untrod Tripod
SleepyKrew
Quilford
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Captain TBD by whoever lasts longest in the Hunger Games

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no Cockettes in Early Bird?

RABBLE

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Do we PM our preferences or just post them in our PT?

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PM please. You'll get a form to fill out in the nearish future.

"PM please" sounds a lot like asking us to PM you, js

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ROLE PM RABBLE

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This made me fucking cry:

Reck was confused - why hadn't this hot cretaceous babe mauled him like the filthy descendant of a wretched shrew-like thing that he was? Why was he not being lovingly absorbed by the digestive system of this perfect, carrion-scented aphrodite?

Almost as if he dared not speculate, he glanced up at her, still expecting the final strike that would end his sexually confused mammalian existence - and saw at once that it would not come. Her eyes were still marked by a ferocious hunger, but it was not for shredded meat she seemed to slaver - she clearly wanted the meat intact! Reck couldn't believe his luck! Slowly, she backed away from him, then coyly turned around so her bird-like hips were on full display mere inches from his face.

*insert image of sexy lizard here*

omg i forgot i did this

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im not disappointed we didn't win; honestly, our team felt rather weak up until much later in each game

I think being forced to play that complicated clusterfuck really sapped us. We didn't have a choice. This is basically the same thing that happened in TM2012, where SDC got really pissed about having to keep up with complex mechanics.

It was a cool idea and I'm sure that's some people's jam, but literally none of us on the team wanted to deal with those mechanics, yet were forced to...add in the fact that UT drew the role that is basically just a passive "don't get caught or town is fucked" role, and it really kept us out of the game.

Big props to Quil, Patrick, and Mina in the micro. Well done by everyone. Possibly other people too! I started reading near the end and Quil argued with me about ETL being scum. Glad he did. I'm a sucker for her meltdown AtE.

SK was a nonentity in the mini near the end, and it's sort of fucked up he was lynched during a time when he hadn't even posted. Like, SK literally checked in after a couple days away and realized he was dead, nobody gave him a chance to do anything. Had we known he was getting lynched and it was "do or die", I probably would've chugged some red bull and done some ISOs and made a case, like I did with UT in the large theme.

As for my game... despite my passive play D1/D2, I'm pretty happy with how we did, overall. There was a lot of bullshit to cut through, and Wisdom made me nearly quit the game (he had 1/5th of the posts in the game)... but after we cut through the bullshit and started working together, it was a pretty easy game. The Katsuki lynch D1 was

atrocious

, though.

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Pretty sure this was gimmick infringement upon a certain God with three-pointed protruderances protruding from it's pantolones region.

i dont understand the reference here

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yeah not releasing mine

i think it becomes bannable if it goes public, so

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5. Young and Beautiful were the only team that won all four games. I know it was suggested in the dead thread that something other than wins should determine things, but ultimately any team that is perfect in their games should be eligible for a victory.

As someone who didn't participate (didn't know how cancer treatment would affect my time on site) but followed along, I feel fairly confidently neutral in saying this: This is pretty terrible.

It's been shown long ago that win/loss records don't really correlate in any way to talent/ability or contribution. This is especially true when game imbalance and uneven distribution of factions plays a factor. I never won a paragon based on win/loss record, and though I haven't tallied my raw statistics in years, I know that at least as of like 2011 I had more town losses than wins. There's something fundamentally wrong with the scoring when a team that did relatively little in their victories happened to be the only team that went 4-0, because their non-teammates carried them to victory four times. The idea that overall win/loss record should be a major determining factor in Team Mafia is about as backwards as can be.

If there is something "fundamentally wrong" with it, then there is something fundamentally wrong with Team Mafia as a whole. Either we operate under the (perhaps fictional) idea that skill influences wins or we don't. But I'm not having a winner of Team Mafia as a whole be a team that won fewer games than another team. It would be unfair, it would defeat the purpose of Team Mafia, etc. It's one thing to use subjective measures as a tie-breaker. It's another to act as if wins and losses don't matter -- they do.

Ultimately I don't know how much simpler or fairer it can be than this: If you win more mafia games than other teams, you win Team Mafia. Any other standard is unacceptable.

This is extremely narrow.

Why not go with a weighted system? You can still have overall record matter MORE, but come up with other qualifiers that can tip the scales if the "perfect record" team gets outperformed by a large margin.

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our PT was long but mostly spam

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also REALLY disappointed we didn't get to do our plan

our plan was that all four of us were going to start singing Katy Perry's "Firework" in tandem across all four games

but then we forgot so UT was like "we need a case on gamma" and we were like "firework"?

then he started it too early so I panicked and rushed out the best case I could before he finished

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rather than release the whole topic, I believe Cockettes will be providing selective quotes:

i just wanna point out that when i tried to type 'scummy' above i actually typed 'dvummy' so i think it's a sign from god that dv is scum

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Spoiler: On Early Game in Twin Trap

QUIL'S GAME

I've never seen Mara play, but her first post struck me as uber try hard. LMAO BPC SAID THE SAME THING.

ETL is likely town for the jump onto Mara. It's a really bad jump, but it reads as genuine. I don't think scum would attack town for skipping RVS? Why do you think "knee jerk" = "scum"? Town also plays kneejerky. Plus the way she calls out Mara reading her as town? I just don't see ETL-scum doing that.

BPC lookin sketch af

Molla can be town for now with that lmao worthy intro post

Mina wtf are you doing

Spoiler: On Hindsight Being 20/20

that katsuki lynch was powerful dumb

Yeah,I'm speechless.

Spoiler: On Stress and Mod Error Mafia

someone fucking help my game because im about to figuratively & literally pull my scrotum out and slap it on the table and flick everyone off

Spoiler: On My Ability to Read Bbmolla

I'm sure I claimed at some point I can read BBmolla, but I don't know why I said that at this point. I guess I might've lynched him correctly a few times. I still think his early D1 personality of being all, "i'm town, come at me bros" would be pretty out of characters/ballsy for scum-molla to do. Plus his whole "lynch me now and get it over with if you're going to do it" sentiment seems genuine and thus comes from town

What percentage of my game do you reckon you've thoroughly read and comprehended?

4%

BUT 80% of bbm's iso!

Spoiler: On Metal Sonic's Play in the Micro

I'll have little commemorative books made out of that ISO. And they will come with little plaques that say 'Between May 10 and 14, 2015, peak wrongness was achieved. Not by a politician, not in a court, but on a little-known Internet site called mafiascum.net, by a member under the name Metal Sonic.

This is the record of his astonishing feat.'

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oh man the molasses orgies bit was great

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no the stuff I would get banned for was almost 100% in Mod Error Mafia

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or rather regarding Mod Error Mafia

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I'm sorry for being kind of a dick in game (esp to you, ffer, way more of the in-game ire was directed at you than you deserved) and afterwords to Y&B and zor, but I kind of had a miserable experience this go-round

Yeah. I never felt like anything really clicked.

I think site culture now versus site culture in 2011 makes this a taxing experience. Back then, the site culture wasn't as spam posty, it wasn't as hostile, and it was more friendly/communal. It made Team Mafia actually

fun

, even if it was taxing. Now, trying to keep up with that many games, with that many teams/players, with the site meta being "angry, bitchy, spamposting"... it just wasn't fun. I think it's also gotten a bit too unwieldy for its own good... six games, but you only play in four, but there's a token system for bidding, but blah blah blah. I know it was done to accommodate more players and make it "unmeta-able"... but accommodating more players isn't necessarily a good thing, and I think the "would someone who's a bad scum player take a scum role?" aspect of it makes the cross-games meta pretty interesting. It's a mechanic that makes Team Mafia unique.