Game of Thrones

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https://twitter.com/JakeThomp11/status/ ... 0819659776

Just felt like I'd stop in here to say that. (That's me btw)

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So I just shut off our HBO cause it was going to start costing us like 30 bucks a month.

I was hoping HBO was

not

one of the ones that wasn't included in my package. Curses.

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OH MAN I AM ALMOST DONE WITH THE FIRST BOOK

Dany just lost Rhaego and killed Drogo and it was the saddest thing that's happened so far.

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Dammit Robb why didn't you listen to your mother about Theon, he's clearly an asshole.

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She hasn't been dumb or wrong as of yet? At least, not that I can tell.

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I only read some of that cause I'm about 2/3 through book two.

She is totally a cunt to Jon Snow which sucks, but let's be honest: badass though Jon is (thus far) he is still a glaring yelling neon sign towards her otherwise-morally-untouchable husband's biggest fuckup. As to sending Ned to King's Landing, I don't think that was a poor decision; there was no way she could have known how Well And Truly Fucked things would get (and really, already were) when she had him go.

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(IIRC there's actually a canon lord who is interested in both sexes and I can't remember who - Taena Merryweather's husband maybe?)

Read through the 3rd book not watching the show but I think that this is

the Red Viper? I know his woman (Ellisaria Sand) is definitely bi.

(Spoiled because I don't think that's important but I'm not sure)

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rapo0h-RDnk

I found this appropriately amusing

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It is almost like they want you to be really upset about it

whoaaaaaaaa

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I was amused by this alternate ending:

this is hilarious

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I am proud to say I have never skipped forward in any book I've ever read.

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Team Dolorous Edd

^5

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I speculate that Rickon becomes a gigantic badass once he is no longer 3 years old.

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that is possibly the coolest thing

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Read Theon's chapters. Do not skip them.

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I've found that almost everybody has a "god can I skip your chapters please" character. Don't skip any chapters; every character is not only important, but ultimately interesting as well!

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You hate

Victarion

?

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

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He could also just be an extra and the producers are fucking with us.

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*shrug* He might just be some dude holding a pike in a fight scene that we get to watch die and/or murder somebody. I don't expect too much more from him with only a couple weeks of filming.

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that was really good

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ok that's pretty sweet.

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Mmmm, Theon.

The men from Game of Thrones are so yummy.

Reck, you lined yourself up for that one, dude.

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I didn't get any substance out of Daario in that one episode. I mostly was just confused by lack of hair.

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I think they should have made the starks black just for funsies

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I think my favorite bit of that episode was the flirty look between Loras and Oberyn. >_>

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Pretty sure book margaery was legit clueless about the plot, but wasn't super-surprised it happened either? I mean, she and Olenna aren't exactly coy with one another about Joffrey.

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It boils down to "if you're gonna write a rape scene in, call it what it is." It's frustrating not because there was a depiction of a rape, but because the director insists it wasn't rape

because Cersei liked it

. That's Rape Culture 101.

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I am inclined to agree with AniX here.

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That said, it still seems extremely out-of-character for Jaime.

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Spoiler:

He explicitly told her that he hates her

Spoiler:

No he didn't? "You are a hateful woman... why have the gods made me love a hateful woman?" is the line.

Spoiler:

I think Korts' point is that Jaime loves her but doesn't really like her anymore.

I dunno, I guess he is still the same guy that pushed Bran out of a window. He's more sympathetic now, but I don't think anyone can say he's not an asshole.

And good god yes Oberyn plz

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In other news, Westeros's brothels really need to start locking rooms' doors. I have lost count of how many interrupted scenes we've had.

Seriously.

That said, if Tywin Lannister walks into your brothel and says "unlock that fucking door," you're prooooobably gonna unlock the fucking door.

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Tierce - Bahahahahaha what a good clip



Aegor - I believe he was the one who said something along the lines of "If I were a woman, I would make them kill me before I let them rape me." Don't remember the context and could be wrong about the character saying it.

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IN OTHER NEWS

this shit is hilarious

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http://imgur.com/KgStI3W

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It boils down to "I like this show, but also there are some exciting sex-things coming up which I am interested in"

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That image is when Tyrion interrupts Oberyn and Ellaria in the brothel. Oberyn asks them if they'd like to join, I believe.

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I don't want to watch a show because it has male nudity. There's enough male nudity on Looking for me, plus an entire internet of pornography, plus I have a pretty cute fiance to ogle.

It's about the fact that watching a show with the ratio of female:male nudity compared to the ratio of female:male characters makes me uncomfortable. I'm not complaining about the lack of female nudity in Looking or Oz, because those are shows with an all male cast. Game of Thrones seems to hire a pretty even number of men and women as principal cast, but then only makes the women strip down nude. I'm excited to see more nudity on the male side because, well obviously because I'm gay, but more than that, because I think there's a serious disparity in the show between showing males and females.

I mean, fuck, even in goddamn sex scenes with both men and women, it's always the women who are trotted out like prized strippers while the men get to conceal themselves.

Straight up.

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I don't think it is absurd at all? I'm not saying I don't get it from a financial / business / viewership perspective (I imagine that female sexy bits tend to sell better than male ones), but from a social justice-type of perspective, it'd be nice to see some more dicks.

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DO IT JASON

DO IT

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My thoughts -

1) I was not enthused about Jaime/Cersei interactions, especially after the events of last week's episode. They're cold and bitchy to each other, and Jaime doesn't do what she asks, but that's kind of... it? It doesn't seem like that's how Cersei would respond to that event. Dunno. Seems disjointed.
2) I had no problem with the Night's Watch scenes. I think it rather serves to remind you who Jon's friends are (and also the thing with "Locke"), in addition to setting up that other stuff that has been spoiled.
3) The Bran / Craster's Keep storyline is super weird. They wrote it in such a way that it makes sense that it's happening, but I don't see how they get out

without meeting up with Jon, which seems to me to be an irrevocable change in the storyline.

4)

White Walkers stuff is totally off-the-wall. Not sure what to make of it, tbh.

5) Daenarys being all JUSTICE NOT MERCY is interesting, and adds a spin to her character I don't remember getting from the books. Not that she was all "mercy allatime," obviously, but for her to turn down Barristan's explicit advice for a wanton (if fair) cruelty is quite startling.

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SER POUNCE

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As a note, I'm pretty sure that both versions are canon? Like, I don't think the book version is any more or less legitimate than the show version in this case.

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He's quite good as Theon. I like him.

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Watched the episode tonight. Was really strong. Davos continues to be excellent, Peter Dinklage is super-badass all the time, I am relieved there was no Wall shit in this episode (I love Jon Snow but a break is appreciated) and omg Dany did something non-badass it's a MIRACLE.

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Huh. So it was.

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I thought the episode was pretty damn good. Nothing is just nothing is a pretty great line, IMO, and I think came right out of the books, IIRC. I am starting to get tired of "Alliser Thorne doesn't like Jon, you guys, just a reminder," but I assume the breaking point to that will be coming in an episode or two, so I can handle it.

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Also the VP of Tits & Ass at HBO apparently was watching the episode and saw Daario's ass for two seconds and hit the fucking PANIC BUTTON because good lord that Melisandre scene was gratuitous

Yeah that's pretty true. I was like "really, we have to see Melisandre's nipples in this scene? That is important to the story?"

I was rather hoping for a cock shot on Daario, too. Nope.

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It was quite scene relevant and actually jarring to me when they didn't go there, pulling me out of the scene.

Totally agreed.

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Yup that was super gross! WHEEE.

Arya cracking was awesome. The commune watched together and all of us cracked up as soon as Arya started laughing, it was great.

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Oh, yeah! Man, he is playing that role

super well

.

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Yeah, I quite liked last night's episode. I was concerned with it being 100% at the wall, but I thought they pulled it off nicely.

Also HOORAY SAM IS A FUCKING REAL PERSON FINALLY

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I really liked it. Agreed that the 30 second shot (it was when Jon jumped off the elevator and Sam snuck over to release Ghost, I think) was pretty amazing from a cinematography standpoint. I honestly felt myself really appreciating Sam in this episode. I really wish that we'd gotten to know pyp and grenn better, though; their deaths didn't really make me feel anything. I thought the most compelling part of Ygritte's death was the fact that it was the little kid Sam talked to who shot her, and Jon just kneeling there in the middle of a goddamned battle was pretty dumb.

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Basically Arya is a stone-cold heartless bitch and that's badass for some reason

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^ I agree with seacore!

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what korts said

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also

please stop posting book stuff in the show thread there is a book thread for that shit

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http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/29221a ... y-children

this shit is friggin hilarious (also the rest of this series is funny too, but this epsiode has SUPER BONUS FUNNY at the end)

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this is going to be so entertaining

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thunk?

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Oh man I am actually so glad they are doing that

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If I were to buy GoT, do I get the next episodes for free as they come out? Or is that the price for just that episode?

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I'm honestly pretty convinced that the show will end differently than the books anyway

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I dunno, I don't think the stuff they've changed has been generally for the worse? We'll see I guess

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polyhaus watched it tonight

pretty good, though nothing on either bran or arya is a bit of a downer (but moar sansa-littlefinger is

always

good with me)

also the Margery/Loras dynamic remains really entertaining

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If no Bran is something that disappoints you, this season is going to be rough for you.

oh yeah i forgot about that

OH WELL

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hmm

hmmmmmmmmmmmm

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I quite enjoyed this episode and found the book departures to be generally enjoyable

Spoiler: BOOK STUFF

particularly the brienne/sansa stuff - it's really interesting to put those two storylines together

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oh I forgot we had that other thread

i will go bring it back to the top brb

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fwiw, he's his brother, not his dad

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I think the non-naive / manipulative "side" is what sansa has moved to - she's no longer her father's daughter.

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FWIW - I highly recommend the podcasts A Cast of Kings and A Storm of Spoilers. They each do an episode per week - ACOK is specifically non-spoilery, and ASOS is specifically very-spoilery.

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I agree with aero

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I think Sansa has been placed in a supremely interesting position - now we wait and see if she's actually become Bad Bitch Sansa like I think we all hope she has, or if Ramsay is going to continue to be SUPERASSHOLE

also, I think it's interesting that we don't know what the letter Cersei sent to Littlefinger said (unless I missed something)

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Also of note -

Theon specifically keeping himself hidden from Sansa, and no on-screen discussion from the Boltons discussing the fact that Sansa may recognize him

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those people are silly

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guys please we have another thread for this stuff

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we now have 3 threads, which is just ridiculous

you'll note that nobody is posting in one of those 3 threads, so we don't

really

have three threads

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guys this split has been worked for the last several seasons there's no reason why it shouldn't work now

this really is not a complicated issue

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https://imgur.com/ZojM9ft

(spoilers for S5E4)

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AniX, I agree with you, but the internet seems to think he didn't show up to the fight for some reason, idk. I mostly just thought that image was entertaining

Brandi - pretty sure that's intended!

Note Sansa's "I'll be a married woman by the time you get back" comment - it creeps her out too

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that is pretty great

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"that metaphor could've killed me" lol

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As a book-reader I really like the fact that the show is basically a different story at this point, and am frankly going to be a bit disappointed if they don't both come to totally different conclusions

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yup

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except for the bit where he's not asexual at all?

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http://boingboing.net/2015/05/12/the-na ... me-of.html

IMPORTANT BUT POSSIBLY CONTROVERSIAL OPINIONS YOU GUYS

bonus points for calling out grooming / modern body standards, which are completely out of sync with the period-piece feel of the rest of the show

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mmm that's true - I forgot about him probably being actually asexual in the books

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seems rather less likely on the show since his wife has several vats full of premature children and he certainly seemed to enjoy himself with Melisandre

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that's all fair

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that's also pretty true

possible exception is saving shireen from greyscale

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you're only now starting to see it?

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"chaos isn't a pit. chaos is a ladder"

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I agree with will!

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I didn't like that it was a surprise attack with no warning right as they were loading up the boats. I don't get how the very porous wall blocked the magic mist. I didn't like that the free folk gave up before the fight even started. I disliked how they had the 'Something is moving on the roof!' scene because we knew they were zombies and it doesn't make sense how they were on the roof of that building already. I didn't like that it took them halfway through the battle to think maybe they should go and get the dragonglass. I absolutely hated how cliched the Female Leader's arc was.

Overall I felt most of the fight was formulaic, watch extra get killed by enemy, watch named character kill several nameless enemy, all while jumping the camera around a bunch like people like to do in order to make it impossible to follow what's going on.

I liked the other big battle scenes I can remember though some of them share a number of sins. I can't remember Blackwater very well since I saw it like three years ago.

i definitely agree with these criticisms, fwiw

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the problem is that "unspeakably terrible things" is no longer a subversion in GOT-world

it has became a genre in and of itself, and the writers are not genre-savvy, it would seem

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that said, I liked this episode, despite shireen's death making me physically ill

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yeah dorne remains dumb as rocks fosho

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(Oh, can we please also not forget the CHILD RAPE? Because I'd very much like to not forget the CHILD RAPE.)

oh fucking seriously that was completely unnecessary and a gigantic pile of shit and to make it even worse it's

completely transparent where they're going with it

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that is quite the limb you're on there

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They should all go to dorne and play slaps tbh

10/10 would watch

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I am definitely in the "OOC for Stannis" crowd, fwiw

ESPECIALLY since they decided to have Selise (sp?) get all motherly right at the end because ?????????

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oh no how dare we care about something that we care about

oh nooooooooooooooooooo

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See, I don't think characters doing "contradictory" things is bad. Real people are inconsistent.
Selyse has been trying her best to be a "good, godly wife" and she spouted a fair amount of BS, but that doesn't mean she hated her child. Like I kinda see Selyse as a broken person who lies to herself to remain sane. "This is a good thing. This is a good thing" She repeats, just to reassure herself. I think that hearing her daughter screaming out for her mother "broke" her.

that's clearly what they were going for, but since literally

every interaction she's had with or about shireen in the whole series

has been negative, it doesn't exactly come across as super-realistic

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melisandre is a pretty great character

gigantic asshole, but great character

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I agree with CDB

generally speaking that episode was pretty shit, imo

benjen long-con was awesome though

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also, super disappointed in sansa resolution

yayyyy being a tool in theon's redemption, that's what I wanted to see out of littlefinger's protege who just got brutally raped, yup

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One person I've really warmed up to is Qyburn. His relationship with Cersei is one of my favorites, because the a creepy ex-maester Dr. Frankenstein should have nothing in common with a nobleborn Queen Regent with a chip on her shoulder, but not only do they get along, he is loyal to her even after she loses all status and is a powerless woman in a prison cell. I thought the scene where he rushes to her side with the cloak was less "Gotta suck up to the boss" and more genuine concern for her physical and emotional pain.

oh my god yes this

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loooooooooooool

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okay but he got stabbed a million times and lost a lot of blood I'm just worried for my sweet stoic bastard prince
(Not asking for spoilers tho pls I can wait~)

This is caught up with the books now so I couldn't spoil you. It's just that they setup the person capable of bringing the dead back to life being in the same place as where he dies.

technically there's a couple of them, one's just on the wrong side of a bigass wall >_> <_<

Maybe he will be reborn as a different actor.

I think this is the least likely option. I assume they want to keep Kit Harington.

Kit Harrington has publicly stated that he's not coming back next season

COULD BE EPIC TROLL but it seems like it'd be difficult to keep that out of the media come filming time

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agreed

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also, super disappointed in sansa resolution

yayyyy being a tool in theon's redemption, that's what I wanted to see out of littlefinger's protege who just got brutally raped, yup

what would have been cool to see is that sansa decided to step up and fight chick with bow and then after sitting around for 15 seconds theon decides to help sansa. the effective character change for theon is the same but while adding some to sansa...

actually better thing to do would have been sansa being emotionally / mentally on top of the game with Ramsay - don't let him abuse her physically because she wraps him around her finger (or at the very least, fucking tries to). We've seen her lie like a boss at the end of last season (I think) when she tells the nobles from the Vale that Littlefinger didn't murder Lysa - she's clearly capable of manipulation while under fairly extreme stress. Why that disappears now seems to be a poor narrative decision at best.

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look I'm just excited for

the BADASS WOMAN COALITION sansa/brinne teamup all day err day please
also Melisandre-as-jons-mother is certainly an interesting speculation though it does seem rather unlikely and out of left field